Advice about being round' a frequent talker

Hey Starise, are you listening to me?

Karyn


Steer them on to a topic you can plug passionately to the point that they never want to speak to you again...

Finally someone has fingered out my strategy here on the forum.

Starise


 
  I want to run away but I can't. I'm trying to look interested but the act is wearing thin. I can't concentrate on anything. I am not married to this person.

tldr

Carry a water pistol on you at all times and just squirt them in the face when they won't shut up. 

I find that if you heartily agree with everything they say, they usually shut up.

Say stuff like, "Oh yeah, I know what you mean." or "Oh, I feel the same way." And smile the whole time. It gives them that little high of the affirmation and belonging they are looking for. Eventually they wear themselves out and stop.

When that doesn't work, I just say, "Man I'm busy, I gotta stop talking and get back to work." They usually get the hint then.

After all that, if none of that works, then you're screwed.

My wife is the opposite. She never talks. She's an introvert. I'm a talker. I'll ramble and ramble and get pissed because she tunes me out like I'm not there.

Although ... she did get my attention at Lowe's this weekend. I was gazing at the most perfectly shaped backside, in the tightest pair of gray nylon slacks, wearing high heals, that I have EVER seen in my ENTIRE life. Out of the blue I get a purse to the sack (from my wife). I let out this yelp and the chick in the tight pants turns around and starts laughing. My wife starts laughing and walks away leaving me there leaning up against a rack in pain.

I gotta go.

LOL!

Tell him you guys have to have a serious talk.

Keep a straight face, and tell him that, you've started feeling certain things for him and that you just can't hide those feelings. Then start singing Afternoon Delight - preferably the second verse. 

He'll never bother you again. ;)

Starise


 
  I want to run away but I can't. I'm trying to look interested but the act is wearing thin. I can't concentrate on anything. I am not married to this person.

Maybe Mooch has some tips?

Rain


Tell him you guys have to have a serious talk.

Keep a straight face, and tell him that, you've started feeling certain things for him and that you just can't hide those feelings. Then start singing Afternoon Delight - preferably the second verse. 

He'll never bother you again. ;)

Yeah... NO...  that one could backfire on you big time.... cause what if he/she actually has those kinds of feelings for you and has kept it secret... using the talking angle to be close to you...?   Then you come out saying THAT.. thinking you're gonna scare them off, and they see a door flung wide open...... now you really are in a fix. 

Best just to look at your watch and exclaim.... "well would you look at the time..... I'm gonna be late...gotta run..... " and turn around and LEAVE...it works for me.... but I skip the whole watch thing and just say..."Man I gotta run.... " and I go.... 

Guitarhacker

Rain


Tell him you guys have to have a serious talk.

Keep a straight face, and tell him that, you've started feeling certain things for him and that you just can't hide those feelings. Then start singing Afternoon Delight - preferably the second verse. 

He'll never bother you again. ;)

Yeah... NO...  that one could backfire on you big time.... cause what if he/she actually has those kinds of feelings for you and has kept it secret... using the talking angle to be close to you...?   Then you come out saying THAT.. thinking you're gonna scare them off, and they see a door flung wide open...... now you really are in a fix. 

Best just to look at your watch and exclaim.... "well would you look at the time..... I'm gonna be late...gotta run..... " and turn around and LEAVE...it works for me.... but I skip the whole watch thing and just say..."Man I gotta run.... " and I go.... 

LOL, yeah I guess so.


But I'm afraid Starise can't just run away. They're working together, if get this correctly. 

And when you're spending 5 days a week, 8 hours a day w/ someone, you sometimes have tough decisions to make, like - what makes me more miserable? Hearing this fellow brag for 8 hours a day or just letting him know how annoying he is, probably hurting him in the process and having to put up w/ his attitude and the tension for an indefinite amount of time.

As a motorcyclist I can highly recommend a good set of ear plugs.

These are my weapon of choice.

Starise


 
  I want to run away but I can't. I'm trying to look interested but the act is wearing thin. I can't concentrate on anything. I am not married to this person.

Wouldn't want to be married to that person, either. But then, if you only had a cursory interest and all you are doing is giving me the cheap acting method ... I wouldn't want to be near you, either!
 
I'm rough on these areas, because I am too damn psychic in relationships and it can get out of hand quickly if the two parties are not willing to find a way to communicate and understand each other. I used to have a couple of minor issues with the lady I loved the most, and one day she cornered me, and asked ... and I said ... what is it that you are afraid of? ... that I can see that you sat in Evan's class with Karen on your left, and she was wearing a blue skirt and a white top? ... some people can see things, and the only thing you can help them with in terms of "seeing" is help them with the perception to get cleaner and clearer ... but if all you are doing is hiding a part of yourself that you don't want me to catch ... we don't have a relationship anymore!
 
We never had that issue again, and talking was rough for me in general, still fighting English really hard then, but all in all it was good ... no complaints here, although I might even have told her ... and expected ... her to be able to ask similar questions if something I said didn't make sense ... or sounded backwards.
 
I was also writing a screenplay and a couple of other things around her ... so she KNEW ... or at least had a fairly good idea ... that it was not malicious as it was about learning and figuring it out.
 
But in my book ... honesty trumps it all ... Bapu or no Bapu! Even though sometimes I think that some comments and replies ... are not necessary, but his post count must not dwindle!

You have to remember the first rule of the happy home life: If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!

My wife is a "frequent talker".
1: She changes subjects in the middle of a conversation.
2: Gives her commentary while somone else is giving the facts (or the real commentary) on TV.
3: She begins talking before she gets in the room or when she hears me coming. (I never know what she is saying or talking about).
4: She talks to herself. In the kitchen when I am in the den, just loud enough so I can hear.
It is all maddening but it will never stop.
 
If she is talking while some talking head is saying something I am interested in, I usually say STOP. If it is the same thing I have heard 100 times in response to some similar thing, I just say OK, over an over, until she stops. When she starts talking when I am not in the room I use my most frequently use word... "WHAT"?
My hearing is not the best and I have a hard time understanding either one when two people are talking at once.
If I am doing something that requires no talking, like reading or recording I tell her in advance to please not talk to me while I am doing this. If I am reading or studying something I will completely lose my train of thought if someone talks to me and will have to go back a ways to get my place again.
 
One of the things that bothers me the most is when we/if we are watching something on TV and I go to the hall bath for a quick weewee... inevitably she will laugh loud and long. Then when I get back say, "roll it back you have got to see this". It is never anything any different than the other tripe but I usually just play along. I know it is harmless and she is well meaning and I know she loves me so I put up with most of it and just go along. It would be really petty of me to complain all the time... however I usually DO say something if she starts talking to me before I get in the room or when she talks to herself and I have to ask if she is talking to me.
 
I think one of the hardest things for a man to learn is that a woman has a primal need to tell and to ask, either when she gets home or when you get home. She will ask a bunch of questions most of which will have an answer of yes or no. If someone calls, she will ask, "who was that"? A: "Smith". What did he say? A: "nothing"... "well I know they didn't say nothing..."  
You have to find a balance between a mans tendency to want to say nothing and know nothing and a womans need to tell and know everything.
 
Bottom line... I am pretty sure ALL women are frequent talkers.
 
J

Then there are the LOUD talkers. When I was a kid there was one old lady who, I swear, you could hear her through the phone from across the room. Most of the women on my wifes side of the family are pretty loud and all talk at once then they are together. I find a hole...

It ain't so bad really. It just is what it is and of course my wife makes good money and alomst never complains (about me). That really helps.

J

I had something really interesting to say on this thread, but I couldn't get a word in edgeways..

''This song is o-ffensive'' 

Jake Thackray - On Again, On Again