Another new demo...plenty of work to do here REMIXED

Another new demo...plenty of work to do here but what do you hear as the biggest problems?http://www.reverbnation.com/play_now/song_13629897 REMIXED 26/06/2012

Well spotted re the bass....it starts playing chords for the rest of the song from there....

I'm surprised people think it's well done. I can hear loads of rough edges!!

This song sounds very retro to me.  I get what you are going for with the vocal processed that way, but the lyrics get swamped by the f/x and the low volume of the vocal.  I think the fix is simple - turn up the vocal, turn down the f/x a bit, and I believe that you can achieve the sound you want.  That would be my starting point.  Otherwise, it's a cool song.

Twigman - this style is right up my alley. Love the song, atmosphere, choice of instrumentation etc but this is what I would do. Dial the vocal effect back a tad so there's more dry less wet. Change the snare sound in the earlier section - it's overwhelming the mix in the quieter section but works great later in the song. Really like the bass chords when they kick in but, they do seem to overpower everything else. I hope someone else's ears helps - I'm not necessarily right but this is how I hear it. 
Really good stuff.

This changes everything.  I like where the vocal sits in the mix, now, and the clarity is much better.  Plus, this song is growing on me, which means it's aging well.  Nice job, Twigman.

Ian, I didn't hear the first mix, but this is quite nice.  interesting sound on the drums - maybe a bit too much reverb for my tastes.  the strings sound good.   the highly processed vocals sound good for this song.  something's bugging me about the snare, but I can't put my finger on exactly what it is.

very nice work.