"Broken" or "Shining Light" (you decide)

(I don't seem to be able to embed links anymore in the forum... all the editing options are GONE! Whaaa??)
 
Another of my Swedish friends has asked me to do a song - I've never worked with him before. 
He asked that I first listen to the instrumental and write a lyric/record it as I heard it.  I came up with "Broken".  http://soundcloud.com/julibee/broken  My lyrics/vox, Max's backing.
 
Then, he asked that I listen to his original and record it as I saw fit, but kept with his original lyric and melody.  So that's what I did, after some very minor vocal re-arranging.  He called his version "Shining Light" (which seems to be a recurring theme with me, at least this week). http://soundcloud.com/julibee/shining-light  Max's Lyric and backing/my vox.
 
So, this is not really up for mix crits, as I KNOW I'm no great shakes at it, and he'll be mixing it anyway.  In fact, I really just threw this together mix-wise, just for samples. 
 
The real question is... overall, which song do you prefer? 
 
I can't make up my mind... But I did just make both of these this morning.  So...  They are raw.
 
(Edit) I forgot to delete the intro clicks.  sorry.... AND, there's a strange click right before I sing that was on his track in the very beginning.  I couldn't do anything about it...)

Hi Jules!

hmm. interesting concept of switching the writing like that.  I think I like the 2nd one better - the one with you singing his vocals/lyrics.

but honestly neither of these is my favorite of your work.  but that's not a complaint against you in any way.  I'm a big fan of yours as well!  I'm just not that fond of these songs, I guess.

I like Shining Light much more...

 Went to your page,checked your music out.....Great voice and chops, well presented.

Thanks for the feedback!  Yeah, I know that these aren't my best, but I was just curious as to which to really get to work on. 

Daryl, You are probably right about the pacing.  In fact, I'm sure you are.  I'll suggest it, but I don't know how it's going to end... My friend likes both versions, and may somehow meld them together, and I'll sing it again for the end result.  "A darn good lyricist!"  That really made my day... :)

No worries, Beags!  I AM glad you liked "Radiant", though... I think that's my favoritest of all for a billion reasons... Thanks, dear.

Phillip, I saw your comment last night at about 11:30, and had a billion and one thoughts run through my head, but was too tired to write it all down.  So let's see if I can remember...

It didn't even occr to me that I was posting bravely by adding something vocally/lyrically half-baked- In fact, I guess since my forte is the writing and singing, rather than the mixing, I don't see it much different than posting a song for mix crits.  But you are probably right in that many people wouldn't "get it" that way.  Another forum I belong to (the Swedish one) has two forums; one for works in progress, and another for more finished pieces (they do still critique and remix at that point, though) - I guess I didn't think it out of place with that experience.  And you know, I feel safe here - I know that some will be faster to criticize than others, and that doesn't bother me in the slightest.  That's why I come here.  Thank you SO Much for your ears and thoughts, my friend.

Frank,  I too, prefer #2, at least the ending.  I'm not wild about the lyrics (that's an understatement), and I hope that Max figures out how to meld them together.  We'll work on it.  Thank you. 

Bill, we'll see where it takes us! 

Thank you, Starise - I'll be looking for you, too....

Wook - I'm just happy to see your fuzzy face.  :D

Hmmm...do I have to choose?  I like them both in their own way. 

Amazing you can throw two of these together in a morning.  Wow!  Beautiful!