Can someone tell me what am I doing wrong?

Hi all. Just wanted to know why does my sound feels "empty". If you listen to mainstream producers, they've got something I clearly don't. If you could, as a listener, tell me what that may be, that would be awesome. Thanks!
 
http://soundcloud.com/user986926639/planes-trains-and-automobiles
 

I have yo agree the chordal stuff it too loud. Either pull that down are pull the bass part up. (Volume balance)

Whle I also somewhat agree on the simple bass part, may this is all it needs; however, some variation could be nice. The remix "could" use that period.

Don't get me wrong, ostinato/repetition is good; however, there's usually something else to distract the listener from it if there's something else there. This tune seems to be nothing, but a varation of the A Theme. For a film it works because there's obvious the scene(s) accompanying it.

Maybe write a melodic riff: It could be: Question/Answer, Call/Response; something to quell the repetition. Having the bass line do more would help. but it's a question how much because if it does too much, it could change the song. Of course, it's ultimately up to you what you think it needs.

I think a nice melodic line at the top or built off the other notes within he harmony would be nice. Maybe a subtle, subdued guitar riff (but not too dirty/distorted; you wanna make sure whatever sound you choose fits and fits well).

The same melodic riff could be given yo the bass part to apply variation. Couple it with the guitar. This is where register would work wonders. IOW, the bass doesn't have to play one or two octaves below the guitar; it'll spark interest if it plays right on top of it.

Of course, you don't wanna take away the main piece of the remix; however, the parts added are stepping on it. Just be careful not to do too much (ironic coming from me, heh)

Here a remix of the Tetris (A Theme): sounds like alot going on and is, but given that this techno/dance: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gs2ocwf8gaM

Listen also to the simple bass line, but clearly the melody is the focus, so the lines or completely fine.

Here's another version (Orchestral): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wBmZAg8HxfY (both A and B, then A again - this could teach you form, too (this is form within itself, ironically) despite these being totally different tunes. (My favorite version)  Melody's played and varied by different instruments and the harmony as well (the second time Theme A is played)

I do like what you did, but the suggestions will help improve it. And I don't think you did anything wrong. The composer's always right as he or she can do anything he or she wishes, but don't shoot down interpretations (not saying you are). Sometimes tunes need alot, but sometimes very little, but the arrangement could make up for what is lost or take away what already there. It's a fine line, so be careful when walking it.


Welcome to he forums, btw.

This song just need another section or two.  The other comments I agree with, but this could easily be made to work.  You're in the ballpark.