Conversation with my granddaughter

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bitflipper
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2014/03/29 13:09:59 (permalink)

Conversation with my granddaughter

Whew. My 10-year-old granddaughter just got her first cell phone yesterday. The text messages started about 7:00 PM...here's a partial transcript.


 
What are you doing?
 
Me: Just shutting down the computer for the night, going to eat supper.
 
I love you
 
Yay!
 
Yay what
 
Yay, somebody loves me! Doesn't that make you go "yay"?
 
Yes but i am sad
 
I know. Me too.
 
Why are you sad
 
Same reason you are.
 
I am said cause of my dad
 
Your dad is also my friend. That's why I'm sad, too.
 
i was craying on tuesday
 
Everybody cries sometimes. Even me.
 
I know on monday me and my brother we were craying
 
We'll go for our walk tomorrow and talk about it, OK?
 
when i told my friend i got sad that is why i do not like talking about it
 
But you can talk to me, can't you? Maybe we can help each other feel better.
 
Kay
 
{Around midnight}
 
i love you
 
i am still awake but tired
 
Having a hard time sleeping?
 
Yes
 
Sometimes when I can't sleep I listen to music.
 
When i do it makes me tired
 
That's the idea.
 
Why
 
Music makes you feel happy. That's why it exists.
 
music makes me happy just not today


 
(Context: she had just found out that her dad is dying.)


All else is in doubt, so this is the truth I cling to. 

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    clintmartin
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 13:19:36 (permalink)
    Sorry to hear the bad news. Your Granddaughter sounds like a smart girl...you must be very proud.

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    jamesg1213
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 14:20:14 (permalink)
    Sorry to hear that Dave. That's a heartbreaking and profound conversation.

     
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    SteveStrummerUK
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 14:46:24 (permalink)
     
    That's so sad Dave, she's far too young to be having to deal with such a tragedy.
     
    Difficult as it must have been for you, you certainly said all the right things. And just giving her the opportunity to talk openly about the situation will have helped her a great deal.

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    Wookiee
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 14:48:56 (permalink)
    Tough one Dave positive thoughts for you and your family. 

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    Rain
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 14:55:22 (permalink)
    Sorry to read that, Bit. Very sad, indeed. 

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    Old55
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 14:55:50 (permalink)
    So sorry to hear about that, Dave.  Your granddaughter, you and the rest of your family are in my thoughts.  

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    drewfx1
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 15:43:29 (permalink)
    That's sad news.
     
    Perhaps you can let her know that there are lots of us out here that have all of you in our thoughts.

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    craigb
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 17:09:42 (permalink)
    Definitely a tough situation.  Good thing she has a cool grandfather to help her get through this! 

     
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    bapu
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 18:16:56 (permalink)
    Sad, but at least she is in touch with the fact that she feels.
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    craigb
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 18:32:14 (permalink)
    bapu
    Sad, but at least she is in touch with the fact that she feels.




    Good point.  MUCH better than keeping it all inside.
     
    My mom lost her father when she was 12 and turned out alright, but her sister (my Aunt) was only 8 and ended up with several mental issues brought on by the event (which she blocked out for decades).

     
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    bitflipper
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 22:05:10 (permalink)
    We've known this was coming for a couple of months but the kids weren't told about it until this past week, when the doctors gave my son-in-law as little as two weeks, maybe up to a couple of months.
     
    But she is a smart girl. She knew her dad was sick and asked me a lot of questions about my parents' and my sister's deaths. I tried to frame it as positively as I could, knowing we'd be having a painful conversation later.
     
    But even though I tried to get her to talk about it, she wouldn't. Not until she got the cell phone and started texting. Somehow that made it easier.
     
    Tonight at the hospital her mom told her to stop bugging grandpa with so many texts. But as she was leaving and I got my hug, I whispered into her ear "text me later". I'll be keeping my phone on the nightstand tonight.


    All else is in doubt, so this is the truth I cling to. 

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    sharke
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/29 22:54:30 (permalink)
    Sorry to hear that, Bit. Kids are tough cookies though, and often far better at adapting and coping than us adults. There comes a time in every kid's life when they learn that their parents aren't indestructible, I'm sorry she's been forced into that realization so young, bless her.

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    yorolpal
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/30 00:32:46 (permalink)
    Life never lets up does it? She's so lucky to have a grandpa like you Dave. Comforting and teachable moments are so difficult...but you're doing fine. So sorry for this situation. But so glad she has someone like you to turn to. Stay strong, ol pal. Stay strong.

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    paulo
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/03/30 08:07:05 (permalink)
    She has a very wise old head to turn to for guidance and you have someone to keep you young. Sounds like a good combo. Sorry to hear the news - been there, done that, but surprisingly a lot of positives also came from the opportunity to be able to say goodbye and such which some people don't get chance to.
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    noldar12
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/04/01 01:00:28 (permalink)
    Very tough indeed, and as has already been said, it is good that she is aware of her feelings (lost a younger sister when I was about 5 and my dad when I was 11 and for one year was in the odd situation of having all four of my grandparents living but no one else from my immediate family. I also made the unhealthy decision to stuff most of my feelings after my dad's death).

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    UbiquitousBubba
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/04/01 08:26:57 (permalink)
    That's hard for anyone to take, let alone a young child. It's wonderful that you can be there for her and that she knows she can contact you anytime. You and your family are in our thoughts and prayers.
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    Mesh
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/04/01 09:10:36 (permalink)
    She's very fortunate to have an understanding and compassionate grandfather like you Dave.......you'll definitely be a pillar of strenght for her.........sorry to hear the bad news about your son-inlaw. 

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    Guitarhacker
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/04/01 10:52:33 (permalink)
    Such a hard thing to deal with. Even though we know it's coming, we're never quite ready.
     
    Draw close to family and friends..... you don't know how long you will be blessed to have them with you and it will all end much too soon.
     
    Prayers for you and your family Dave as you all go through the hard times to come.

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    jbow
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/04/01 11:11:48 (permalink)
    I'm glad you are there for her.

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    Bob Oister
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    Re: Conversation with my granddaughter 2014/04/02 16:41:27 (permalink)
    So sorry to hear that, Dave, my thoughts and prayers are with you, your granddaughter and your entire family.  Your granddaughter sounds very wise beyond her years, and is very lucky to have a wonderful, caring grandfather like yourself.
     
    Sincere Best Wishes,
    Bob
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