When you're playing an outdoor gig, make sure your cymbal stands are firmly secured.  When the wind picks up and your ride cymbal attempts to take flight, holding it down can somewhat crimp your playing style.

When your pants split from waistband to waistband, they're not laughing with you...

Never play in a venue where you have to carry your gear up three or more flights of stairs.  No matter what he may have promised, the guitarist is never there to help carry gear.

Make sure someone is responsible for getting the bass player to the gig.  He won't get himself there.  That's for sure.

When you put your bass drum pedal through the head of your bass drum, creative improvisation is the key.

When the keyboard player asks you just before staring each song, "How does that one go?" don't crack a stick over his head.  You might need it later.

Don't leave the building between sets.  Chances are very high that no one will believe that you're with the band.

Never book a gig in an upstairs venue during the week between Christmas and New Years Day in Chicago during a snow storm. 

When your band outnumbers the crowd, don't save anything for an encore.

When playing guitar use a wireless instead of cable...

Playing while spinning round and round with the cable going around your legs causes certain things to happen....

When I did that I was doing something of a spinning thing..got my legs caught by the cable and went crashing onto mine backside...I finished the dang solo on me back...they had to pick me up at the end...

Karyn

Beagle


when you go to the bathroom between sets, make sure you tripple check your fly before going back to the stage.

Incase its missing?

if something were missing there I would really have been worried.

rsp@odyssey.net

ProjectM


@ Randy - THAT could actually explain a thing or two

Personally, I will advice everyone to remember to wear a belt, especially when using wireless microphones and you intend to jump off the stage or get into other shenanigans. Before you know it you're lying flat on your stomach with your pants around your ankles in the middle of the crowd you're supposed to... er, entertain?

Just to clear things up a little, my advice was something that happened to my drummer. He married my wife's sister and is now my brother inlaw. I would never have put blow in my back pocket to save for later. I didn't have that kind of discipline.
 
Randy

Let me guess, it wasn't blow either...

Which leads me to another don't.

Don't inhale poppers at the start of a set, especially if somebody offers it as a challenge for money.

Absolutely hysterical, Randy!  Between this and your spasmodic drummer, that must be quite a show!

Bub


Never let your fuddy duddy bass player go up to a group of bikers at the High Noon Bar & Grill in Budd Lake NJ and tell them the band is going to dedicate "I Love How You Love Me" to them coming up in the next set.

LOL I've been in a similar situation only it was "Shake Your Hips" in our case. All I heard was "what da *^&*%&  did you say to me?"

I'll offer a serious tip.  Always check the stage outlets before plugging in.  All you need is a cheap ($3?) tester that you put into the outlet that will tell you if the outlet is wired correctly.  Make sure you check them all!  If ANY are wired incorrectly do NOT use it (and notify the owner/manager about it).  Should you plug in your guitar rig to one and the gear for the microphone are plugged in elsewhere and one is wired backwards you will zap yourself when you touch the mic stand and could be killed (several have).  I watched a guy seriously burn his hand doing this - and he got off lucky.

Even if you "only" burn out your gear, it's still not worth it when it only takes a moment and a $3 item to check.

On the lighter side, keep a pair of drumsticks on the dashboard of your car so you can park in the handicap spots.

Never let your fuddy duddy bass player go up to a group of bikers at the High Noon Bar & Grill in Budd Lake NJ and tell them the band is going to dedicate "I Love How You Love Me" to them coming up in the next set.

I think I played there once. IIRC, we changed the set to do more of our Skynard stuff :)  Which reminds me ...  Always plan your escape before someone pulls out a gun and starts causing trouble. 

And if all else fails, you can always play the theme from Raw Hide... good ole blues brothers style!

ProjectM

rsp@odyssey.net

ProjectM


@ Randy - THAT could actually explain a thing or two

Personally, I will advice everyone to remember to wear a belt, especially when using wireless microphones and you intend to jump off the stage or get into other shenanigans. Before you know it you're lying flat on your stomach with your pants around your ankles in the middle of the crowd you're supposed to... er, entertain?

Just to clear things up a little, my advice was something that happened to my drummer. He married my wife's sister and is now my brother inlaw. I would never have put blow in my back pocket to save for later. I didn't have that kind of discipline.
 
Randy

OH, I didn't mean you Randy, I've just seen musicians flail around on the stage like a carp on a dock more than once. Maybe now we have the explanation to why

It's all good M. I was more concerned that folks might think I was a drummer.
 
 
Randy

rsp@odyssey.net
It's all good M. I was more concerned that folks might think I was a drummer. 
 
 
Randy

Oh the horror!

rsp@odyssey.net

ProjectM

rsp@odyssey.net

ProjectM


@ Randy - THAT could actually explain a thing or two

Personally, I will advice everyone to remember to wear a belt, especially when using wireless microphones and you intend to jump off the stage or get into other shenanigans. Before you know it you're lying flat on your stomach with your pants around your ankles in the middle of the crowd you're supposed to... er, entertain?

Just to clear things up a little, my advice was something that happened to my drummer. He married my wife's sister and is now my brother inlaw. I would never have put blow in my back pocket to save for later. I didn't have that kind of discipline.
 
Randy

OH, I didn't mean you Randy, I've just seen musicians flail around on the stage like a carp on a dock more than once. Maybe now we have the explanation to why

It's all good M. I was more concerned that folks might think I was a drummer.
 
 
Randy

I get your point. Now that's an accusation no one wants!