Even Me - Jehovah Shammah - first acoustic (rev C)

Fear...

Hi Bretb, don't want to start of pedantic but it's Jehova, not Jahova. Nice song if a bit generic, sorry.  Singing is nice. The acoustic guitar that's playing the lead lines could be a little louder, imho, and a bit more in tune. I don't want to come over all negative because this certainly has potential .

Greetings Rik

Nice song.  Good vocalist.  I agree with Herb that there are a couple of pitchy spots.  I thought I also heard a few timing issues not sure.
 
This comment is more a personal one for me but I think this arrangement sounds a bit dated.  It reminds me of the Hosana Integrity & Vineyard days of the late 80's early 90's.  That's not a bad thing just something to consider if you're trying to target a specific listener.

Thanks for all the great input.

I suck at spelling but really should have got Jehovah right. 

I have not yet looked at the vocals with v-vocal or melodine but I will.

It is very dry as there has not yet been any delay or verb added to any tracks, but there will be after the comments.  I understand that it should be very little.

I have noticed the lack of dynamics on this also but not sure how to improve on it.  There is some use of compressor using the ProChannel but only the slightest amount to keep things in check.  None of these instuments are very dynamic.

As far as noise reduction on the tracks, I tried to get the guitar players not to breath but they couldn't finish the song.  So we allowed this.  Have to check on the "crackle".

Thanks for all of your inputs, keep them comming.  I will be going back to the mix to make some changes in the near future.

I am sure the noises are the guitar tracks.  I will listen intently and correct if possible.  Thanks for sharing your examples.  The first track is great and I especially enjoyed the percussion.  Thanks for your input acoustigod.

When it comes to music, there's no cheating, IMHO.  To be real, you've proclaimed the message.  I know the Word commands to "play skillfully with a stringed instrument" ... and/or "make a joyful noise to the Lord" ... and/or preach/sing/teach the gospel (death, burial, and resurrection of Jehovah-Is-Salvation).  (all 3 take a lot of skill!)

"The LORD Shammah" ... Ouch!  had to look it up --haha!

Pensive message: 10/10
Acoustic guitar chiming 10/10.

Song and style seems to be unique and sprouting.  Some improvements, perhaps:
1) More vox verb ... less in your face ... to make her more pensive (per spiritual groaning)
2) More Hass fx on acoustic guitars (wide-panned)
3) More vocals joining in half way ... to allow this to be hymn-like, convincing, public, and less-self-centered.  That might invite me to groan for deliverence more.
4) Allow a proven song-structure like: AAAA, ABABAB, AABA, verse-chorus, etc. ... to make this more mainstream-pop ...
5) The hook "Shammah", is easily forgotten; I'd have preferred "The Lord is There" repeated over and over.
6) To make this 'Gospel', I'd have boldly begged the Death Burial and Ressurecton more explicitly, shifting the focus from myBattles.  But, the message is still 10/10 ... as I relate to this to my sin-sores and many o.t. psalms follow this pattern.
7) Buy a 'black-gospel' groove or 10 at producerloops.com and burst out of the CCM-drudge, Assembly-of-God, Hozannah-stereotype ... a problem for psalmists (of Alabama) ... the o.t. cliche of Jewish words, no Resurrection glories, etc. 

Again, these are all personal and spiritual, so I may be wrong to encourage you to invade other genres, grooves, instruments, and percussives.  There is a praise-song of your genre I'm madly in love with, the copyrighted: "Hozanna to the King".  (A hellish shame, IMO, 'Christians' have to copyright God's songs (and God's Holy Bibles) and charge royalties for others to sing the free Gospel)

First, like the song, playing and singing

second what Acousticgod said.

The first thing I thought was WOW this is loud, everything was really in my face (and I do hip hop etc most of the time).

A little bit of tweaking though this could be a really nice tune.

I have now revised the mix based on your great comments.  This forum is great to focus your attention on areas that might have been overlooked.  I am trying to be a good student of the art.  Hope you like the new mix and comment on any additional requirements to a final product.  Thanks again!
 
I can't use v-vocal until after X1b comes out.  X1a crashes on every attempt.

After revision, no comments.  Is it done or behond hope?  Thanks in advance.

I commented on one last week.  This must be a new one.  You spelled Jehovah wrong on that post?  Either way, it really doesn't sound acoustic to me.  I totally like it and I love the singer's voice!!  It seems somehow that she's back in the mix or something.  Seems loud enough but not totally present.  Other guys up here can give suggestions and maybe I'm wrong.  I think she has a beautiful voice but it seems thin in the mix.  IMHO

I agree...she has a beautiful voice and this is a nice tune.  I have no idea how to help you with the mix, but the guys that have posted do.  Keep up the good work!

The mix elements are all recorded fairly well...though I detected a little background noise somewhere in there that should be gated. 

The mix is very one-dimensional.  At minimum, there should be a "front" and a "back" to most mixes. Your mix has a lot of "front".  Even if you just had one small element of your mix that was wet (reverb), dark (treble rolled off a touch with EQ) and softer in volume.  I'd probably go for just the snare (or whatever that is that's playing the back beat).

In any event, this could be made to sound terrific in about 10 minutes.

Peace,
Jonas

Thanks for all of the great input.  I will make a few minor tweeks and go to the next project.  Mark, don't know about the ending for you, it should gradually fade out.  I just played the track and thats what it did.  Jonas, I will try to add some depth to the mix.

Not crazy about the drums either but it is as good I can playing on a wooden box.

There is a noticeable drag on the beat somewhere around 2:30 or so.  That can be fixed.

Could use some dynamics, as a lot of P&W tunes get so bogged down with 'holiness' that they lose their sights on making it a better song.

I like the singer's voice, but it is really buried back there on this version. Take a few minutes to listen to it solo'd and fix the bum notes. You are close with this, so make it right. 

Not a big fan of the genre, though have listened to more than most, I would reckon.  

Tis is excellent for a first acoustic recording Bret.

The guitar sounds great on my speakers and so does the mix.

Lovely vocals that are perfect for this track.