Proverbs 16 with Brother Anson on vocals

There's a lot of high end distortion of sorts bleeding through the vocal track that a de-esser might help with such as "Spitfish".  He's got a nice voice.
Great psalm to use and i liked the guitar meandering.

Thank you very much for sharing this.

I listened ...... To me, and this is solely my opinion, a lot more work is needed. 

You have a good idea here. I would suggest a more structured musical background...verses and choruses.... I didn't listen to it all the way through but as far as I did listen, I could detect no structure in it to that point. OK... realizing , maybe I would miss something important, I did go back to the page and listen all the way through. And yes, I stand by my original comment. There is no structure to this.


Using the verses from the Bible as inspiration is OK, but the meter and the feel of the original songs( back in the day of King David)... different time from ours, 3000yrs ago?  There is no problem with re-writing it to fit today's audience. Many CCM artists have done that with great success and results.

Musically, the vox are a bit flat sounding, as in muted and lifeless and without clean highs.
The guitar is out of tune and tends to ramble  in what seems to be a never ending journey to find a pattern.

Now... you can be mad at me, and discount what I said, or you can take this and rework it, spend some time on it and turn it into something really creative. It currently sounds like someone (with a good voice) reading and singing from the Bible, to a guitar that is played without much pre-planning, and then some background strings & electric piano are thrown in for good measure.

One of the guys here has a saying in his signature to the effect that: It takes just as much effort to record a bad song as it does a good one.... well I would agree with that .... so, to make the effort worth it, take plenty of time, before you ever turn the recorder on and get the song right first.

I hope you find some value in my words. They are not intended to criticize you, or your efforts. Hopefully, they will point you in the right direction... towards better writing.

Just a side note: personally, many of the songs I write, and cowrite, get rewritten and reworked sometimes as many as 7 or 8 times before we finally call it "finished"... and recently, we took one that had gone that many revisions, and after about 8 months of listening to it, put it back in the work bin and reworked some parts about 5 more times.... bouncing it back & forth to get the newest "finished" version. So do not be afraid to put in the time to write the best song you can write.

Now..... just go and do it!
 

Yeah... you're right.... nice stuff..


It's hard to know the background of someone on this forum.... so I appreciate the BG on the song and the website link to other music that you've done.

Herb, Enjoyed your site and music. I thought you would apreciate my site, so I just had to visit yours as well. Great music and a good mission.

Janet, Always a pleasure to hear from you and thank you for listening. Heard more of your great music on Herbs site. Great work as always.

Blessings to you both,

John

If I were stuck on an island and I could only take one book of the Bible, it would be the Psalms...

Guitarhacker


I listened ...... To me, and this is solely my opinion, a lot more work is needed. 

You have a good idea here. I would suggest a more structured musical background...verses and choruses.... I didn't listen to it all the way through but as far as I did listen, I could detect no structure in it to that point. OK... realizing , maybe I would miss something important, I did go back to the page and listen all the way through. And yes, I stand by my original comment. There is no structure to this.


Using the verses from the Bible as inspiration is OK, but the meter and the feel of the original songs( back in the day of King David)... different time from ours, 3000yrs ago?  There is no problem with re-writing it to fit today's audience. Many CCM artists have done that with great success and results.

Musically, the vox are a bit flat sounding, as in muted and lifeless and without clean highs.
The guitar is out of tune and tends to ramble  in what seems to be a never ending journey to find a pattern.

Now... you can be mad at me, and discount what I said, or you can take this and rework it, spend some time on it and turn it into something really creative. It currently sounds like someone (with a good voice) reading and singing from the Bible, to a guitar that is played without much pre-planning, and then some background strings & electric piano are thrown in for good measure.

One of the guys here has a saying in his signature to the effect that: It takes just as much effort to record a bad song as it does a good one.... well I would agree with that .... so, to make the effort worth it, take plenty of time, before you ever turn the recorder on and get the song right first.

I hope you find some value in my words. They are not intended to criticize you, or your efforts. Hopefully, they will point you in the right direction... towards better writing.

Just a side note: personally, many of the songs I write, and cowrite, get rewritten and reworked sometimes as many as 7 or 8 times before we finally call it "finished"... and recently, we took one that had gone that many revisions, and after about 8 months of listening to it, put it back in the work bin and reworked some parts about 5 more times.... bouncing it back & forth to get the newest "finished" version. So do not be afraid to put in the time to write the best song you can write. 
  
   
 

Now..... just go and do it!
 
 
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That has to be the "Best" post (music critic) that I have ever read on this forum.
Thumbs up to ya Guitarhacker.

Tim...........:)

The double speed percussion on the right channel does not work for me.  Great voice but during the monologue there are time that it seemed that the speaker was too close to the mic so it created some distorsion.  Agree with the comments on using a "de-esser"