Re:mmmm..maybe cat/dog pix should be a part of bickerfest threads
2011/09/09 10:10:51
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I remember the old time (or Olde Tyme) bickerfests we used to have.
Cousin Ebby would always soak himself in deer urine. We're not really sure why. Aunt Sue Ellen Lissy Jim Ann would whip out that old shotgun faster than you could say, "It wasn't me!" She had a voice that could cure leather while still on the cow and a face that could melt a truck at 50 paces. Elroy Junior III sharpened the toes on his cowboy boots to a razor edge. He wouldn't hit, but he'd kick until you no longer wanted to have legs. He had one good eye that would sometimes go off on its own to wander around in his head. We always thought it got bored. Great Granpappy Bo François carried a lighter. When arguments got started, he'd hold his lighter behind his backside and the resulting flames would dispel any dissenting opinions. He could boil water from about 30 feet away. About three or four times a year, he burned down a barn, town hall, the McGillicutty's wheat field, or fire station. Alright Uncle Clem was a little odd. Granny Snuff always said he wasn't quite right. We called him Alright Uncle because his part of the family tree sort of wrapped around the trunk a few times, ducked under some roots, and came back up again. He wasn't a Great Uncle. He wasn't a good one either. He was Alright. Anyway, rumors spread that he sometimes skinned folk who argued with him. No one was really sure about that except for Faceless Freddie.
When these people got to bickerin', you got as far away as possible as fast as your remaining limbs would carry you.