Insecure

It sometimes gets tiring when a person keeps on downing you and mocking you in front of your friends and listeners in the public web. I know i'm still an improving live vocalist, especially that playing the fretless is both challenging and tiring while doing harsh vocals, since i can't cup my hand on the mic. I also get tense when i don't hear myself. I also know to myself that it was just a bad performance at that time, but those feelings sometimes just turns to pessimism.

We were friends once but then he turned all against me when i defended another friend from his arrogance. A friend of mine got a gift from another friend, then this "guy" then commented on the photo of the gift and told the receiver that "That item sucks. Sell it and buy a different model! :D". I then thought that he shouldn't have said that because both the receiver and the giver would be upset, and the giver was a close friend of mine too. But then he became hostile and a "sore loser".

If he's trying to upset me, he's winning. A minute ago i was happy with a pre-prod of a new song, but now i'm down. I feel i shouldn't be because i know he's insecure or still pissed. How do you handle such things? Ignoring - Yeah, but sometimes it's hard to do that.

Sorry for the serious topic, i've got no friends awake now..



(edited for spell checking)

@Mike

Thanks Mike. And I'm sorry, i just don't know where to vent or place my sentiments..

No need to apologize. This place has all kinds of purposes. Try not to let negative influences affect your attitude. Keep him at arms length for awhile, and things will probably settle down between you guys. If not, might be time to move on to a different kind of friendship.

Randy

Here is a quote from Dr Joseph Murphy from that amazing book 'The Power of Your Subconscious Mind' A book that everyone should read IMO.

"The suggestions and statements of others have no power to hurt you. The only power is the movement of your own thought. You can choose to reject the thoughts and statements of others and affirm the good. You have the power to choose how you will react"

It always helps me if I keep an absent mind

OK Severed now for the hard part! Here are three quotes from the same incredible book by Joseph Murphy in the chapter on forgiveness.

'Resentment, hatred, ill will and hostility are behind a host of maladies. Forgive yourself and everybody else by pouring out love, life, joy and goodwill to all who have hurt you. Continue until such time as you can meet them in your mind and know that you are at peace with them"


"To forgive is to give something for. Give love, peace, joy, wisdom, and all the blessings of life to the other, until there is not sting left in your mind. This is the acid test of forgiveness"


'If someone has hurt you, lied about and vilified you, and has said all manner of evil about you, is your thought of that person negative? If so, you have not yet forgiven. The roots of hatred are still in your subconscious mind, playing havoc with you and your good. The only way to wither those roots is with love. Wish for the person all the blessings of life. This is meaning of Forgive until seventy times seven"

So what do you think of those little gems of advice. I know that is going to be hard. Having no respect for him is not the way to go. You can do it. You sound like someone who I think can.

He's only doing it because he (conciously or not) feels inferior to you and, instead of trying to better himself, must knock others around him down.  Although you might not see it, every time you remain yourself and standup for your friends when you should it will definitely get noticed by the people who are most important to you and the other guy will soon find the only one he is fooling is himself.

The correct path is rarely the easiest.

Those books are B.S. Don't say it won't happen again, because if you let it happen the first time they will keep on going on with it. The action to take is just to find new friends and forget and do not put up with the old ones. I know from personal experience that only evil lurks in their cold black hearts. Never anything else, and only will they make you a slave in the sense that you do not hold more esteem for yourself in the first place.

Thanks again guys. I feel better now. [:)}

Back to making music!

I have a couple of friends who drifted apart this way.  In an effort to "joke around", one used to mock the other's singing.  The one being mocked knew it was a joke, but it began to hurt anyway, especially since it didn't stop.  Eventually, the chasm between them grew to the point where the relationship disappeared. 

There are good critics and bad ones.  A good critic will always give you an accurate evaluation with the intent of helping you to improve.  A bad one will either tear you down or flatter you with neither extreme being all that accurate or helpful.  As you encounter all these voices, it's important to focus on the good ones.  They're the ones that have your best interests at heart.