Goodbye

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davdud101
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2012/12/02 09:46:43 (permalink)

Goodbye

Another one of my pop-ish songs. This one's both old (2 yrs) and good (although below is both the redux AND the original). Tell me what you think (preferably for the new one)!
 
Redux (2012):
http://soundcloud.com/davdud101/goodbye-r
 
Original (2010):
http://soundcloud.com/davdud101/goodbye-original-pop-song-2010  

 
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5 Replies Related Threads

    Janet
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    Re:Goodbye 2012/12/02 10:43:59 (permalink)
    Great song!  I really like the strings accompaniment.  The vocal could be improved a bit, maybe with V-vocal or melodyne.  Not bad, but I'm noticing 'something.'  You might consider lowering the volume of the percussion.  

    Overall, great song!  :) 
    #2
    Lynn
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    Re:Goodbye 2012/12/02 11:20:44 (permalink)
    As Janet says, this is a great song that's just a few tweaks from being a great mix.  To start, the snare sounds like an 808 snare drum sample which doesn't quite seem to fit with this style.  A more natural sounding snare would feel better, I think, and if you turned it down a notch or two it would sit in the mix better.  A touch of pitch correction on the vocals would be in order.  Overall the whole mix sounds very narrow as far as panning goes.  Spreading the instruments out would open up the mix.  I, too, like the strings, but a little variation of the volume levels would help it sound less sequenced.  You are very close to having a real gem.

    All the best,
    Lynn

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    #3
    davdud101
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    Re:Goodbye 2012/12/02 16:08:01 (permalink)
    Maaan, do I love this forum and the ability to get repeat feedback (as opposed to, f.e., KVRAudio which is PACKED). Thanks for that!

    Janet (and Lynn), I'll a look at some Autotuning to help out with the vocals, although I'll admit I thought there weren't many parts that needed it... Anyone willing to give specific time marks where I'll need to touch up? (Besides the bridge. i hear it in the bridge fo sho)


    That, Lynn, is actually an honest-to-gosh 808 snare sample. I'll give a shot to using more realistic samples for it, but I'm a bit partial to that particular sample because it's the same as the one I used in the original recording (and I therefore had really no other idea for it besides what I pulled from the original version)

    I think the fact I used few instruments makes it tougher to add panning, as if that would "de-beef" the core/middle of the mix, especially the piano and bass, where, respectively, the mids and bass freqs lie. I'll give it a try for sure.

    I'll try out some volume and velocity variations

    Thanks for listening, and for the feedback! I'll have a revised version up soon once I make some changes.
    post edited by davdud101 - 2012/12/02 16:13:44

     
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    notnat
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    Re:Goodbye 2012/12/04 22:21:14 (permalink)
    cool song... a little pitchy but well done... very nice background vocal arrangement...

    I listened to both versions...
    I can hear the vocals better on the new track, but its still competing with the horn? patch which occupies the same frequency range as the vox... filter the patch until the vox comes through better... then pitch correct the vox...
    #5
    Guitarhacker
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    Re:Goodbye 2012/12/05 11:29:05 (permalink)
    Nice job.... 

    Over all a good job but a few nits 

    the percussion is a bit bright for the rest of the soundscape. Either calm it down or brighten some other stuff so it fits better.

    On the vocals and pitch.... I always, always take every vocal track, no matter how we sung and on pitch it seems to be and I run melodyne on it. I go through it manually ( no autofix) and look and listen very carefully. If something is good to the ear and is close to the pitch I leave it alone. But sometimes there are things that you will see that are slightly off....sharp or flat, and pulling them on to the pitch or at least closer to the pitch makes a world of difference. 
    I didn't hear major issues in this area but if you have melodyne.... I would certainly run it. 

    Nice work.



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