Jamesyoyo Re-Creates: Broken Everyday!

James Yeomans (Jamesyoyo) just introduced 2 mainstream re-creations of my song: Broken Everyday!

... the song quickly evolved into 2 rather diverse and unique genre-versions: 'Modern' Pop and Trance.

James has suggested to present both of these new versions for your comments. (Some of you listened/commented on my original 'labored' mix) ... I anxiously await your thoughts on these brand-new mainstream mixes (also shorter)

His 1st Pop Version:
"Broken Everyday! Re-mixed by James Yeomans"

His 2nd Trance Version ('House Mix')
"Broken Everyday! TRANCE Version, by James Yeomans"

Please take some time to crit, comment, question, suggest, cite your preferences, etc. Thank you exceedingly for your thoughts on his work.

Kinda echo on No Hows comments, but only kinda
Pop-version; a bit "over the top" regarding the arrangement - to much going on, all over...drums, strings, guitars, piano, horns, "pling plong" etc etc.
The vox gets burried in the arrangement. A little (read a lot) less of everything (exept vox) would probably solve it.

Trance-version; way cooler , but the same as above - the vox dissapears in the arrangement.

All dynamics were washed away in what sounded to me like main stream mediocrity. It seems to have it's soul sucked out of it (but you could dance to it)

Rick--The song is Lamentation 3 (of Jeremiah) almost word-for-word quoted from the Bible ... but made to rhyme.
1) For it to end up as a trance-dance seems sort of ironic ... who ever danced to a lamentation? Right?
2) OTOH--The Hebrews of old seemed (to me) extremely loud and flamboyant with their music (e.g., Psalm 150) ... employing about every instrument available, with absolutely no restrictions to the genre of doxologies. For some reason, the Holy Bible seems, perhaps, to be quiet regarding genre. IIRC, many psalms could well have been sung in trance-mode ... depending on their hired singers, the season, generation, etc.
3) Ironicially, my old-fashioned oriental wife danced (immediately) to the "soul-sucked" trance version. She stated that "many persons can't get into songs that are too ocean-deep all the time.

Pop-version; a bit "over the top" regarding the arrangement - to much going on, all over...drums, strings, guitars, piano, horns, "pling plong" etc etc.
The vox gets burried in the arrangement. A little (read a lot) less of everything (exept vox) would probably solve it.

Trance-version; way cooler , but the same as above - the vox dissapears in the arrangement.

M. Man -- I'm almost certain James would be interested in this comment.
In the Trance version, the trance elements are dominant and the voxes are secondary ... reverbed back. To me the club-mix has much-inspired octane up-and-front ... the voxes seem discernable (to my ears) and form counterpoint melodies to the house-mix. Should the listener home-in, he/she can dig-out the vox-treasures.

Kevin -- Thanks so much for your listen and crit. I heard the Trance version 2.5 times before I fell in love with it. Its DIFFERENT, yes ... but excellent to my ears.

Note, I just recently received these 2 mixes.
There are vox enhancement in the Pop version that I failed to capture in my version. (Both of James' versions rapture me on several levels.)

Rick -- I'm pretty over-the-hill, but I don't think the Hebrews-of-old cared much for gospel-quartets, piano-hymnals, cathedral-organs, blue-grass genre and/or our guitars and electronica. But I was pleasantly *shocked* when my wife came in dancing to the trance ... loving every minute of it.

Thanks much Janet for your listen, time, and (2nd) crit(s). I agree that the Pop version needs vocals a bit less ambiant and/or sculpted up-front a dcb.

ditto, and it's always interesting to hear someone else's take on your ideas.

Sheesh. Tough crowd. I knew touching any of Philip's masterpieces would earn some harsh reviews.
As I have commented to Philip in the past, he occupies his own musical orbit. But rather than remixing this (as as my original intention), the Muse led me down this re-imagining path.
The much-maligned Pop version (though not done by any stretch) was trying to find some more simple elements that folks could easier relate to, all the while trying to keep many of Philip's extravagant flourishes. If it sounds busy, that is why (never mind that I cut out about 4 different instruments, but no matter).

As for the "tortuous" trance beat, that happy accident came about due to trying to find an appropriate patch on the Pop version. In reality, there is nothing but vocals and midi drum patterns from Phil's original. To me there was something cool about that style of music juxtaposed against those voices, though I really didn't get it myself at first. So I left it there. But something kept drawing me back to it. In reality I don't think I spent three hours in total fooling around with it.

Well, c'est la vie.

Interesting experiment Philip & James! Of the two I preferred the 'trance' version (too much frantic bass & drums in the 'pop' version for me)

Pro-sounding mixes on both for sure. Not entirely convinced either of the treatments really suit the song, but a cool idea nonetheless.

James G (Acrobats' Supper) -- Thanks for your listen and crit; you may have been more inclined to listen, knowing that James Yoyo touched this?
To me, Trance version has a northern USA appeal (Chicago, NY, etc.) or high-paced cities of the U.K. ... a fast-paced no-b.s. environment. Also, Trance seems to me something few of us pioneered upon, especially with lamentation-genre music, non-addictive per se. Trance, though not always immediately addictive, 'gets me going' ... 'keeps me awake', etc. ... more than my old-school mixes.

I am certain a lot of the harmonic brilliance is lost in the repetitiveness of the trance. A huge spectrum of sonic color has been funneled into something narrow and grey. There is a unique child-like quality your music carries that is entirely lost in these mixes.

Rick -- I seriously appreciate your return to this ... your penetrating crit is irresistable, to me.
The child voxes seem somewhat of an inspired gimmick or an embellishment at least. Magical child-falsetto many Rock-stars, Yes, Supertramp, etc. emulate. I seriously wonder if Supertramp would have better succeeded had little Michael Jackson sung the lead.Singular child voxes add serious upper harmonics, presence, and emotive excellencies that vox-EQ-compressors fail to achieve. I'm absolutely shocked that we don't all grab our children and invoke them to sing. Interestingly, a child's shrilly vox may be good for 7-10 years.
Music treads on deep, often, holy ground. I'm certain you, James Yoyo, Robby, and others, are aware of the sub-conscious yet forcible effects scriptural and/or satanic music invokes on persons. I rarely flip on a TV without music propaganda (usually its earthy or materialistic)

Robby -- An ELP reference? You've been around the block!

James Yoyo -- Caleb (my 18y/o classicalist (idiot?!)) predicts you will make yet a 3rd version of Broken Everyday. I've already stated, I'm astounded and overly-inspired with both of your mixes, as is.

(There do remain minor melodic masking issues in a couple initial verses of your Pop-version). The half has not been told!

Here's a recap:

Jim,

'Listened again today. I really really love this; I couldn't have imagined a better way to mainstream this than what you did ... from start to end. Some of the incredible things I've perceived:

-- The up-tempo (dancing and lively ... albeit same 120 BPM) ... I had hoped at least the 2nd half would be lively; you got the whole thing lively!
-- The "Everyday" hook during start; I had pondered if/how to merge the 2 songs as one.
-- Taming the 'radio' lamentation towards the end was a great decision (it was a bit harsh in my version)
-- 2:20 interlude vox -- a serious JamesYoyo hook (which I initially and desperately hoped for)
-- Digging out the complex melodies and emphasizing them with grandeur ... especially the piano: C --> Em thing.
-- Enhancing the string melody during the 3:48 bridge-rest.
-- Discarding the awkward 3rd chorus and discarding the superfluous finale
-- Exotic and catchy beats with the drums
-- *chyme* embellishments
-- You've enhanced the essence and musicality per se.
-- Its actually become a more-Philip-than-Philip piece, even with the Latin additions, IMO.

To me, this truly is an astonishing force you've unleashed. I'm exceedingly proud of this. Thank-you!
--Philip

Cliff -- Thank you for listening. I, too, am amazed on the the 2 styles going on (if you include my original(s), there are 3 basic styles/genres)

My own genre(s) and style(s) ... are extremely limited in scope. I've heard eclectic styles that combine genres ... many I love immensely ... ELO/Jeff Lynne for example (light-orchestra + pop-rock), Rap + pop-R&B, etc.

Eclectic genres are usually awesome to my ears.

Thanks Jon for your multi-listens and thoughts.

I know you've done collabs with astonishing artists, and understand 'that new up-beat sound' is oft what you're collab-musician(s) gave you (or me in this case). I learn more from my forum friends than anyone else.

Song-writers are all mysterious and beautiful. These are some of the deepest waters I've been in. Oft bizarre music becomes fixed into the mainstream, and vice-versa. I hear awesome songs by ALL the faithful members here of late.

Doug -- Very well. FWIW, I personally like Jame's versions better than mine for radio play and mainstream ... and will integrate much of his labors into my original. Thank you very much for listening.
To recap, Jame's edits, the 2nd half of the pop version (2:20+) and his singing is a must for my *final* prints.
I await your next piece.