Karyn
I'm to sexy for this forum..

Yes, but don't go...

Cheeto Sign - having nausea and evidence of Cheeto dust at the same time.
 
Do people snort Cheeto dust? I bet that makes one's schnozz look weird. It gives a hole new meaning to orange sunshine... Sunshine.  Is the dust crunchy just on a smaller scale? Too crunchy for this forum?
Actually I prefer Dorito dust.
 
 

Cool Ranch? 

Bass Player. Is that an oxymoron? There is a reason that most basses have only four strings like an ahem.. ukulele.

craigb
Cool Ranch? 

Only if I cannot get Nacho Cheese or these bad boys:
These look good!

OK... young people do not watch "News Channels" huh? If I bought everything they advertise on News channels, I would use my Hurry cane to make my way to the fridge to get a bottle of Ensure then call and buy some gold (to put in my safe) then hobble to the "walk in bath" and call an attorney because I "may have been harmed". Perhaps my catheter sample pack would arrive before I got out of the "walk in tub". Then I'd need to go to the doctor so I could ask him if several new medicines are right for me. Then when the day is over I would get a great night of sleep on My Pillow...
My favorite line in a recent commercial is, "I guarantee this may help you". Huh??
 
BTW, what the heck is "handling" and why does it cost so much? SW will ship (and handle) a guitar for FREE but it costs 20 dollars to ship and "handle" some trinket or cat toy.... oh, and there is a new Vego-matic sort of chopper that if you call now you get two for the price of one, of course you have to pay double shipping and "handling" that costs more than the product. Why do I need TWO food choppers?? Oh... there is a new diabetes medicine, but I don't have diabetes... dang. Side effects include death.
"Hi, I'm William DeVane, never mind about the gold, buy this here silver". What's in your jar?
 
J

We went to B, B, and Beyond a week or two ago, they have ALL that TV stuff and more. They have Sharke vacuum mowers too!
I went next door and got some marzipan covered chocolate.

Where did Bapu go. I though I could Depend on him to bee here.