Jeez, you're just not liking any of the answers eh?
Well, to future-proof yourself you should make a track template with this stuff added so you never have to have this problem again. Boom!
as for the current project, if none of the other solutions are gonna work, just drop it in on one track, then CTRL-drag it to the others to copy it in. It's a manual process, but if the tracks are all grouped near each other and you have them expanded just enough to see their FX Bins you can blast this out in about a minute or so.