Karyn
Hey Jim
Normally I agree with every word you say without even reading it...
The stage I normally work is 20 feet deep by 30 feet wide. With a guitar amp on the back of the stage and the guitarist playing to the crowd at the front, that's an instant 20ms (approx) lag...
If you put the guitar in a front of stage monitor and the guitarist is 6' tall he still hears a 6ms lag (with a 14ms slap back echo from the backline).
My point? My personal opinion is it's unrealistic to expect latency less than 10ms as if the "real world" was better. It just doesn't happen unless you spend your entire career wearing headphones or IEMs.
Hi Karyn,
I play live quite a bit...

You can compensate/accommodate larger delays... but it starts to affect feel/comfort.
ie: When going out into the audience, you can really start to feel the lag.
In the studio, play thru an amp-sim plugin at 5ms total round-trip latency, then at 14ms, then go back to 5ms.
Which one feels better?
I much prefer the immediacy (feel) of low round-trip latency.
With today's gear, it's easy to achieve low round-trip latency.
Make the right choice... and it's a non issue.