Hi,
I, once, got in trouble with my girlfriend, because she asked me ... what do you want for Christmas? ... and I said, nothing but a whole day with you and you and you, and nothing but you!
I guess it depends on what kind of materialist you are ... to me the "feelings" and appreciation of the "moments" is much more important ... but I know there are a lot of women out there, that you have to get them flowers, and kisses, and what not ... and the moments are not important.
I never gave up those "special"moments ... but it might be the reason for a lot of poetry, and no marriages. I finally gave up the whole game 15 years ago ... not worth the hassle playing with dolls that think they are on Wall Street!
I have no issues giving someone flowers anymore ... that was also a hard lesson from the same person ... but in the end ... perspective is the issue with me ... and from knowing what it took for a monster to get to his level in literature, there are somethings that sometimes you have to stick with ... yourself and your work is one of them! The rest ... I can keep my pants up!
I also told a lady to get lost once ... she wanted that 3k ring ... I didn't get it last time and I'm gonna get it this time ... and I said ... what's more important to you ... the ring or the person ... she said ... the ring ... yeah ... I told her ... buy it yourself ... and left! Somewhere along the line, perspective and understanding has to be in place ... and the marriage is NOT a game ... you can have fun and play games, but the marriage itself is not a game!