Konradh, your system has a wall, similar to mine, and that wall varies in different projects, depending on the virtual instruments / effects being used, but there's always a wall. Not sure why you don't like the freezing workaround ?
When I unfreeze VSTis, it only takes a few seconds, then you can edit midi, and to re-freeze is still less than a minute for most tracks. (I have 1 Kontakt sample set that takes about 5 minutes to load, and therefore 5 minutes to unfreeze)
You've mentioned "hiding and muting" your hardware synth's recorded audio, but do you also "archive" these tracks ?
My understanding has always been that archiving tracks, frees up more system resources.
When my system hits the wall, the symptoms are more like the timeline cursor starts hanging, and crackling sounds occur, unlike your experience where "project plays, meters move, but no sound comes out" . . . so I'm thinking brundlefly's post about soundcard and driver issues may be key.
I know from your previous posts that you use Music Lab Real Guitar etc . . a lot. I use this a lot also (64 bit version), and have found it has a very light "hit" on my system . . . I seldom have to freeze these tracks.
Finally, where are your VSTi samples located ? On the system drive, on another drive ?
You've mentioned adding Dimension Pro is an issue . . . have you moved the DimPro multisamples to another location or are they still on your system drive ?