Your voice fits the music very well but I can't understand the
lyrics - too low in the mix. I really wanted the chorus (around 2:00) to stand
out and I think you could do that with a bit more instrumental variety and/or another vocal track.
I like what you did with the short string phrases throughout to emphasize chord changes.

Certainly competitive volume wise. There's some good tonality to the vocal when he gets low...nice resonance. The track sounds tight. But back to the vocal...it sounds a tad removed from the track and the performance is not 100% assured. That's normal for a home demo...if that's what this is. There's not a lot to sink your teeth into once you've got the foot tapping down to the banging drums and the guitar riffs, there's not much variety. Also the track keeps dipping in volume. Is that so people don't steal it?

Not bad!
 
Decent bass balance but overall harsh sounding.  You need to EQ some separation between the different elements of the mix as I feel they're occupying similar sonic territory.
 
For example, the snare, whilst it has a good thump to it, the crack of the snare is in the same range as the guitars so it feels hidden.

Vocal needs some de-essing and a space found for it the mix.
 
Anyway, just commenting on the mix and not the song. 
 
I'd strip away the guitars and work on getting the bass and drums pumping, then bring in the guitars. I'd also EQ the guitars separately and then group them to an AUX track for further EQing as a group - I find this useful for carving out space once I'm happy with the balance between my guitar parts.
 
 

Thank you all for the comments!
 
@Bjorn Good ideas for the vocals (chorus) I wiil work on it.
 
@montezuma The vocals part is not final, I will resing it and make it sound different.
 
@MagicMike Good ideas with the frequencies. I will try my best. Unfortunately I don't have a major pro studio... but I'll do my best. Guitars? I am not completely happy with them either so thanks for the "work-routine" idea!