I listened to the new version on headphones. Always a pleasure to dig in to a Lynn song. The work on the vocal and background vocal blends is stellar. Are you sure you are not Brian Wilson? Strings in great spots, nice trippy ballad overall!
 
I though I was going to be clever and super observant about the sax being too left, then I read the comments above. Bad news might be, I listened on h-phones to version 2 and I'd still call the sax as being too left. Just an opinion. It's not horrendous or anything. That patch might use a little vibrato somehow. It's great to have sax panned left when the vocal is doing its thing, but in the saxophone solo sections, can you automate envelope it back to center, just for the sax solo? And then tuck it away left side again when the soloin's done? Just a thought.
 
Do you have Kontakt, Lynn? If not, there's some horn patches available in Kontakt that elevate fake sax to a higher level of fakeness.  :)
 
Another idea fwiw: the piano, I can hear you drop the volume on it when the singing is happening, so that's perfect. In the spot when the piano is a feature, it sounds like every single piano note is midi velocity 104 or something. If you are compressing that piano, you might ease up a bit, so there could be more variation in velocities of notes. It would let the nice arpeggio breathe a bit. That's a good part.
 
You have written an awesome song and these are just niggles. Vocals are great, and your melody line for those vocals has a great sense of cadence for a ballad. That's tough to pull off. Really liked it.
 
cheers,
-Tom
 
 
 

dcumpian
Sounds pretty good here Lynn...
 
Really good song you have here. The only two things I might consider is 1) there may be too much of the sax (I kind of agree with cwestmont here), and 2) the song's rhythm is so enforced with the hi hat and piano on the beat that I thought adding something on the off-beats would make it flow just a bit better, like maybe a shaker or tambo.
 
Regards,
Dan

Dan, thanks for taking a listen to this and commenting.  I totally agree on trying a shaker on the off beats to counter the bongos and high hat.  I'm still on the fence about the sax/lead vocal balance.  There's a huge discrepancy between stereo and mono levels.  However, this is exactly the kind of observation that I was hoping for.

Hey Lynn
Yeah this one really works. There's more vocal presence which I think it really needed. And I like how the sax kind of communicates with the vocal during the song, but I think I'd drop the sax solo at the intro.
Great song!

I've only listened to the new version. The balance on mix sounds pleasant  on my speakers.
Well done job with the midi guitar playing. Nice song and sounds

wow - I LOVE this Lynn - brilliant - sorry I'm late to the party.
I am going to have to get you to play 'sax' on something of mine....!!??
Great song/mix/performances and that sax sound!

Tom, it's awesome the way you take the time to make a detailed review.  It's very helpful.  I like your ideas about the vibrato on sax and allowing the piano to breathe a bit more.  That can be done fairly easily.  I placed the sax at 45% left in this version (from 50%) to balance the synth pads in the right channel.  The piano is centered because it's a nice stereo sample from Wave's Grand Rhapsody.  As for Kontakt, I only have the free version and no sax samples yet.  Actually, I would prefer a real sax player for this, but I still get the flavor I'm looking for.  Thanks so much.

Bjorn, thanks for taking a second listen to this tune.   I've received so many good ideas, that I'm starting to feel comfortable about this song.  I played this song several  times without the sax intro, however, I actually started writing this song based on the intro.  I wonder if replacing the sax with a flute would work there.  The flute samples I have work very well with MidiGuitar 2.  Thanks for sticking with me!
 
Makke, it's good to hear from you!  Thanks for having a listen and taking the time to comment.  I really like your new song.

Lynn
Bjorn, thanks for taking a second listen to this tune.   I've received so many good ideas, that I'm starting to feel comfortable about this song.  I played this song several  times without the sax intro, however, I actually started writing this song based on the intro.  I wonder if replacing the sax with a flute would work there.  The flute samples I have work very well with MidiGuitar 2.  Thanks for sticking with me!
 
Makke, it's good to hear from you!  Thanks for having a listen and taking the time to comment.  I really like your new song.

Don't stay married to something that may not be working. I've had to whack lots of stuff before the end, even something as important as the intro that led to the song. It happens...
 
In the end though, it is your song. Do what feels right to you...
 
Regards,
Dan
 

Daryl, it's good to hear from you!  Thanks for your kind words.  I'd be happy to contribute anything to one of your songs.

Hey Lynn,
 
Love your voice and really enjoyed this song. Sweet job.
 
I'm not good at saying things tactfully, so take my comments with a grain of salt:

• After the initial deeper sax, I really like the sound of the higher sax. Sorry, I'm not so experienced with knowing which sax is which (tenor, etc.). 
• I really like the sax riffs you've pulled off. Sounds very real and emotive, almost like a Gilmour solo! Loved, and I mean absolutely loved, the last sax solo before "I'd do anything ..." it was hair raising.
• It sounds like you have over eq'd the drum track, there's no snap to the snare.
• I think you've over done compression on the vox.
• I'd definitely bring the strings forward in the mix, add volume to them as the song proceeds.

 
Beautiful song. Thanks for sharing,
Timbo