The moment you are talking rms levels you should be also talking VU meters and ones that are real preferably with needles etc. But there are some good alternate VST'as though such as the Klanghelm meter.
I usually end up doing all this fine tuning in a separate editing software like Adobe Audition etc.. Cool Edit Pro..
Firstly because I use the K system when I create an album all my tracks are at the same rms level but when there are variations eg from another pre mastered album this is what I do:
I open all the tracks up in an editor and then put a VU meter over the tracks one by one. Now with a VU meter you have to give it a reference level. eg a good mastering level might be -12 dB FS = 0dB VU. So when the tracks are sitting around -12 dB rms wise the needle is just swinging nicely up to the 0 dB VU mark.
If a track is low it wall fall short. eg a -16 dB rms track will only make -4 on the meter now. So what I do is hard limit the whole track so that no peaks go over -5 db. You will find in a low level track like this that not many peaks are hitting that mark anyway. Then I add 4 dB to the whole track. The hard limiting prevents any odd peaks from preventing you from adding 4 dB to the whole track. You certainly wont hear it. Then the track comes up to a nice 12 dB FS rms level and the peaks are only hitting -1dB which is good for any conversions to mp3. And now showing 0 dB VU like the others.
Loud tracks are going to swing the needle over. So a loud track eg mastered to -10 dB FS rms will push the needle up to +2 dB VU most of the time. So I just subtract 2 db of gain from the whole track. Dont sweat any peaks now because you are lowering the tracks level. Now the track will be at -12 dB FS rms and the needle should be just swinging nicely up to 0 dB VU like the others.
Do this and you will be going a long way to all your tracks being very even in volume and level all the way through. Burn a CD and check.
The only thing to watch out for is tracks that only have say guitar and vocal in them. Even if you get them swinging nice up to the 0 dB VU mark you will find those tracks will sound a little loud compared to the band tracks. I generally shave off another 2 dB off those types of tracks and then they sit nice against the band tracks.
Don't let anyone tell you that adding or subtrcating gain from final mixes is altering the quality. That is rubbish and I defy anyone to hear the difference in an A/B test. Remember Cool Edit or Audition is working in 32 bit/64 bit in the background which is often double the 16 bit resolution that the actual track is finally mixed at. Even a 24 bit track being gain changed at 32 bit resolution won't create any issues either.
You need VU meters to do this. Your peak metering is useless in this mode of operation. And rms meters that are sitting way down on the scale are also useless. You need something like the Klanghem meter that is swinging right up to the 0 db VU mark when the track is at the right level. Then you
really see what is going on.