Like savoy suggested, first make sure the onboard sound card shows up in device manager and is functional.
In Sonar prefs, in playback and recording, what is the driver mode? If it's ASIO, that's why the Realtek isn't showing up. Most onboard sound ships like Realtek don't have ASIO drivers. You can switch to WDM or MME, but most likely the latency will be terrible.
As a workaround, download ASIO4all, a free wrapper that will allow your Realtek driver to be used under ASIO, and give you workable latencies.