Share Drivers With Other Programs Will basically make sonar relinquish control of the audio device when the program loses Windows focus. So I don't think its your problem unless your clicking away from sonar.
If your using another audio program on your computer sonar can share drivers with that program.
Why don't you give me a little more detail on whats going on,
For example, What midi device do you not have hooked up ? Are you triggering midi from this device or using soft synths ?