Im with ya man.
Im from the age where every reel, machine I owned had a pitch knob.
Typically if I need to change the speed or pitch of something I will import the data to Sony Soundfordge.
Which (I believe) uses Izotope algorithms.
The day and age we live in, this should be as easy as turning a digital knob.
But for what its worth, we take a lot for granite in these times we live in. Some things are not as simple as we think.
These threads typically all end the same. I know someone is going to say "Well Reaper does it".

Sonar does it too, its just not as easy as I would like.