I was serious about the kazoo comment. It's a strong, consistent signal...admittedly not very expressive, but you can tweak that with editing and automation. Probably your best bet would be an electric one, like
this model.
If you have mobility with your feet and legs, another option is using a set of organ bass pedals, like the StudioLogic MP-113. There are quite a few inexpensive DIY MIDI bass pedal projects as well if you or a friend could put one together.