"MARIA" - UPDATED

Hi Patrick,
wow.. very catchy melody,well sung and great guitarwork.drums are cool too..
found MARIA very serious very good vibe...enjoyed..

...and except for a few nit picky spots, your voice sounds great.

I think I am zeroing in on the nitpicky vocal flubs. This song is deceptively difficult to sing though, (i've been working on the vocals for a month now) so I might leave it as is, with the exception of a few major problems I am starting to notice.

I have some ideas for percussion and arrangement, too. If you are interested in them we can discuss over email or over the phone.

cool. theultimatemegaking AT pathamm DOT com is the email you should use! I am anxious to hear what you have to say about it. This is one of my favorite songs I have written, so hopefully I am not too entrenched in it to be open to suggestions!

gracias, amigo!

Very nice Pat, just a few pitch issues in the vocals. The instrumentation sounds excellent!

Good song, lots of interesting touches all the way through. One mild little criticism: though it's characteristic of a lot of guitar-based music, your song kind of hammers in a whole-note harmony all the way through: the chords change exactly on the bar line, pretty much every bar -- maybe an occasional change on another beat, or some intentional non-harmonic notes here and there? A more vivacious bass line might do the same thing, perhaps.

yeah, I see what you mean. I change it up on a few spots, but LITERALLY only a few. I am thinking of some ways to work with this, but the song was written as a chugga-chugga guitar style, so I am not sure how much I want to change it. The bass is not final, yet. Maybe that will help a bit...

Thanks for listening and commenting, though!

Also when you retrack the bass, add some more variation than the strong 8th note lines - just a little bit here and there.

Hmmm...Pat - I don't know if you know this - but Ed is a seriously bad ass bass player and he's doin a little pro bono stuff right now...He seems to like the song...Hmmmm...My wheels are turning...

Huge talent waiting to break through. Loved the song. Same thing as MJ said around 2:00 obviously something missing there. But man this song is good.

Very good song, nice catchy chorus. Well played. That's the good stuff. The suggestion to add some varition to the rhythym, especially the drums; for example I like how the guitar and bass the pattern at 0:43, I could hear the drum answer that call during 0:48 - 0:52. Also when you retrack the bass, add some more variation than the strong 8th note lines - just a little bit here and there.

Ed, the drums are a pretty tough spot for me in this song. I went to a lot of trouble to make them sound real (seems I always program drums that sound like the drummer has 4 arms!) and my goal was to make short, tight, "real" fills. Perhaps in my effort to not overdue the drumming, I didn't pay enough attention to the playing. I must admit, though, I am not too good at drum programming. Any suggestions?

Hmmm...Pat - I don't know if you know this - but Ed is a seriously bad ass bass player and he's doin a little pro bono stuff right now...He seems to like the song...Hmmmm...My wheels are turning...

Yeah Dan, I have noticed that from a few posts on this songs forum, and the wheels were turning for me, too. The thing is, I used to play this song in my old band GUM! with my brother Peter on guitar and my brother Philip on bass. Both of them are excited about recording their parts for this song.

Have to echo the voice things-because it's so good the "unstable" notes stand out more.

Michael, I can't figure out why, but this song is IMPOSSIBLE for me to sing. it has taken so long to get right. Problem is, I have trouble hearing where the pitch is screwy. If you take another listen, would you mind pointing out any trouble spots you hear? For the record, the "yea, yea, she smiles at me" parts were done quickly at the end, so they will all be redone...

Huge talent waiting to break through. Loved the song. Same thing as MJ said around 2:00 obviously something missing there. But man this song is good.

Wow! Thanks, Kiwis! Oh, and that thing that's missing is a guitar solo.

Thank you everyone, for listening and giving me such excellent comments!!

I was going to chart out the "less than wonderful" parts but seem to have a broken link.

I was going to chart out the "less than wonderful" parts but seem to have a broken link.

hm. still works for me, but my ISP is sometimes less than wonderful. try again in a few minutes...

Thanks!

no prob. I am actually a big fan of your music. Catchy and I really like the compositions...

no prob. I am actually a big fan of your music. Catchy and I really like the compositions...

Thanks again, Tazman. Now I feel really terrible for calling you a chump earlier...

Not for calling you an idiot though. I am an expert at sniffing them out... I have "Idiot-Dar"

Regarding bass: I can understand your bros wanting a piece of this, it's a great song. Still, I wouldn't mind doing a track on another tune sometime, my email is ed_mcg via hotmail.

I will definitely kee that in mind! Thanks, Ed!

What exactly does that mean? Like a key? Like you're going to etch it?

well, I am sure as hell going to try!