New Song I wrote For my Wife- " Julie In White"

 
  I don't think I ever really finish one of my songs. This is what I was able to do so far.
 
http://soundcloud.com/starise/julie-in-white

 Thanks I'm on a reverb habit and I can't seem to kick it. Appreciate your comments.

Well I'm blown away by this one. If you've never finished any of your songs then how does this sound like you're completely amazing on the piano :p

Honestly I'm just really impressed at your musical skills considering how modest your first post was. I do agree with others about the vocals though. They do need something, but maybe not quite so much what they have right now. They need something else. I think that Beagle knows what he's talking about with the piano as well. I would have liked to have heard a more deep and big sounding piano considering how good you obviously are at playing it! Anyway man, really nice song. Also I'm sure your wife is very pleased at having a song written for her. I've gotta remember to do that for my wife one day :)

Ali

Good song.

I do have to agree on the cloning/doubling. It is tempting to use the "tricks" to thicken a vocal. But it's better not to do that. Use the double tracking method Beagle mention IF you feel it is necessary to do that.

I think it is better to learn how to make a fat sounding vocal out of one good track. Not easy at times, but worth it once you get the details nailed down.

I also found the hard panned drums to be distracting. IMHO, drums and bass as well as lead vox should be pretty much down the center. Pan the other stuff but keep those tracks in the middle.

Hi Starise,

Really nice song. I totally get the effect on the vocals, but it does need a little tweaking. One thing I do, and it takes me 20 ~ 30 takes sometimes because I am not a singer is, I sing the double part rather than clone it. There's a huge difference. You can get the effect you were going for, or blend it in so the vocal is fatter, but it's unheard.

I think the piano sound is really good but is a little distorted on the right. Could be an artifact of the MP3 on Soundcloud (they're known for that). I get what Herb is saying about the drums being panned, but again, it's personal preference. I was listening to The Beatles for the first time in a LONG time the other night and on some of their songs they hard panned the bass, snare, acoustic, vocals, they went crazy and it seemed to work out ok for them. :) The biggest thing I had with the snare you chose was, it didn't sound natural on the headphones I'm listening to it on.

It does need a little tweaking, but it's a great start. You're 95% there.

Bub

 Beagle- Thanks for taking the time to listen to the tune. I wanted to color the chorus on purpose but the effect ended up being a little different than I had envisioned. I wanted a psychedelic effect kind of like " Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds"........I tried to do this by first changing the pitch of my voice in the chorus and then by adding a cakewalk modulation effect. I added a chorus with 6vo mix into each chorus clip. The effect was close but not quite there. It almost sounds like a flanger on "Lucy".
 The pitch change in my voice on the Chorus is at a part of my range that I don't consider a good tone. I think I could improve on it. Like someone else has said the vocals need something for sure.

  I am using a Hardware Roland keyboard for the piano. Thanks for listening and for your input.

Ali- I appreciate your listening and I will take the suggestions to heart. I have only maybe had three piano lessons in my lifetime so I appreciate the compliments on my playing!

Bob- Thanks again for listening!! I think my studio setup is decent but maybe it was some judgments I made in trying to have a psychedelic sound in the chorus that got me into trouble. I will revisit the chorus...thanks again man your opinions are valuable to me.


 Herb- I did track vocals out of a dedicated vocal unit IN STEREO...maybe a mistake,although I had thought it would add to the effect I attempted to get. I did try summing to mono and things didn't seem much different.Thinking outside the traditional engineer box is probably not a good idea but sometimes you can get a different good result. Trial and error here. Thanks for your comments!

 Radio- THANKS!!

Bub- Thanks for listening! I  thought the same thing about the drums. Needs a little more work.

MGH-Yes I added the 6vo Cakewalk chorus, maybe a more traditional approach is in order. I appreciate your listening and your comments.
 

 Yeah my wife cried and I wasn't sure if it was because the song was so bad or if she liked it lol.

Nice song. The bright, aggressive solo piano playing reminds me of John Cale.  Nice playing.
I have to agree about the vocal effect, but in some aspects it does work but should be used sparingly on a ballad of this nature.