One of those phone calls you don't want...

A couple of months ago I thought I noticed one of the skin moles on my side felt a little tiny bit different. Didn't pay much attention to it, other than trying to keep an eye on it. Time passed.

More recently after we'd moved here and I started training, I realized that this wasn't just an impression and that thing had definitely got bigger. I could see the bump in the mirror when lifting. My wife too noticed and asked about it. 

It hitched. I saw what looked like tiny little scabs on it, all around, as if it had been bleeding, or as if it was drying and getting ready to fall off. 

So two weeks ago I asked my wife to book me an appointment w/ her dermatologist at the same time as hers the following Wednesday if possible. The weekend before the appointment, while we were in San Diego, the darn thing started bleeding for no reason, pretty badly. I thought this couldn't be good.

As much as I hate to go see the doctor, Wednesday couldn't come quickly enough. The dermatologist removed the bugger, checked around and noticed two others on the other side that he wanted to remove. He told me that they'd analyze them and would call me back sometimes toward the end of the following week (so, this week), most likely Friday (today), if they found anything nasty. Only if... Otherwise, no call.

I guess the reason I was worried was that I never go to the doctor - unless it really can't be fixed w/ duct tape or by ignoring it for long enough. I was afraid that he'd tell me something like: too late son, damage done, you should've come earlier.


Officially, if they found anything, they were only going to remove some more, dig a bit deeper, but this also meant that they'd probably want to run blood test, and that's the part I imagined where it could go wrong. I lost my mother to cancer, I've smoked for almost 30 years - and we're all at risk nowadays, anyway...

Anyway, a lot of things ran through my mind during those last few weeks but just last night I made one decision (related to that other thread I've started a couple of days ago). If no bad news came in and I was to live on for a while, I was going to buy that guitar I want the minute I have a bit of money coming in.

Not a copy, not one that's not exactly what I want - it'll be exactly how I want, from the paint job to the fret inlays to the knobs and it will have that big Gibson logo on the headstock. I will own one of these babies in my lifetime. Call them overpriced, call them what you want - for once, I'm not settling for the cheaper alternative. :P

Now I can breathe. 

Thanks a lot, I appreciate, really. Since today was the deadline, so I'm supposed to be clear. Though I can't help but think that maybe there was some extra delay and that the phone will ring next week. :s But officially, it was no later than today.

I went through this 6 years ago Rain. Only I wasn't insured and it ended up costing me a fortune. I had a very dark, irregular shaped mole on my upper left arm. I ignored it for ages and eventually the worry got to me and I went to a dermatologist to ask him about it. He told me that it looked ominous, that he'd remove it immediately and send it away for testing. 

Well a few days later he called me with the bad news, melanoma! The good news was that it wasn't too far advanced and that as long as I didn't delay treatment, I stood over a 95% chance of survival. The thought of paying for everything out of pocket was, to be honest, the scariest part. I was referred to a cancer specialist at NYU, and he explained to me how far advanced it was and told me that I basically had 6 weeks to have the surgery. Any longer than that and there was a chance it could spread to my lymph system and well, I didn't want to think about that. 

Being British of course I had the option of flying home from New York and having it done on the NHS. But making inquiries I was told that I could wait much longer than 6 weeks to have the surgery, in fact that it could be anything up 12 weeks. I guess that's one of the disadvantages of "free" healthcare. I couldn't take that risk. When I asked the NYU guy how soon I could have it done here, he asked me "when are you next free?" 

To be honest the cost wasn't as bad as I was expecting. It cost me just over $10,000. If I had been earning less there would have been various ways in which they would have reduced the price, and they basically gave me the option of paying it back as slowly as I liked, if I so desired. They could not have been more accommodating and I have to say I was surprised considering all of the horror stories I'd read about US health care. 

Anyway I had the surgery, they did a damn good job and they removed all traces of the cancer. The hospitals here are truly top notch, it was a real eye opener having only previously experienced hospitals in Britain. Having said that, the fact that I was paying for my stay out of pocket drove me to make a really crazy decision - that I was going to check myself out just 4 hours after coming out of the anesthetic, being self employed and having to get up at 7am the next day to keep my business going. So I dragged myself down the hall with drip still attached, got told I was nuts, and before I knew it I was staggering along 1st Avenue in 90 degree heat trying to flag down a cab. At 7am the next day I was in the shower feeling as weak as a kitten and trying not to get my bandage wet. This is a neat little story I tell my current employees when they have a cold and want the day off. 

6 years later I'm fine - dermatological checkups every 6 months (every 3 months for the first 2 years) and I'm a lot more cautious about the sun. Nothing educates you more about the dangers of the sun than going through skin cancer. It freaks me out to see people sun bathing. 

Anyway man, glad it seems OK for you, but if by any chance anything does come of it, don't worry. It's a lot less scary than you think when it's actually happening, and these people really know what they're doing. 

As a Canadian, I totally get what you mean. Don't know if you saw this one:







Having had the "chance" to visit hospitals and specialists here in the US as well as in Russia and Spain during the last 2 years helped me put things in perspective. Free healthcare does have its downsides. Not to say that doctors and nurses in Canada aren't giving their 150%, but, we've been much luckier here in the US and elsewhere in the world. 

Anyway, I couldn't really go back to Canada for treatment - it'd take 3 months for me just to be eligible to free healthcare again, so who knows how long before I ever get treatment.

It took what seemed like forever for my Mom to convince her doctors that something was wrong, so long in fact that, by the time they figured things out, she had a cancerous tumor the size of a watermelon...  The facts I was given were that the survival rate was really, really bad - somewhere around 3%.

But, she got great care and was determined to beat it (a very key point in my mind) so, after the usual bombardment of chemo, she's still alive at 84 a full 15 years later!

Just another reason (along with personal experience) that intent and belief that YOU have control over your body and not the other way around are huge factors in your health.

Rain


As a Canadian, I totally get what you mean. Don't know if you saw this one:







Having had the "chance" to visit hospitals and specialists here in the US as well as in Russia and Spain during the last 2 years helped me put things in perspective. Free healthcare does have its downsides. Not to say that doctors and nurses in Canada aren't giving their 150%, but, we've been much luckier here in the US and elsewhere in the world. 

Anyway, I couldn't really go back to Canada for treatment - it'd take 3 months for me just to be eligible to free healthcare again, so who knows how long before I ever get treatment.

EEEEK!!!


I hated the treatments...made me really really ill....


But. 


Whatever one does  do, no matter where you will be...good vibes will be there...

Positive thoughts for you Rain and all the other sufferers from those things that try to stop the music.

I sure hope everything is OK... and FWIW... get the guitar you want no matter what the Dr. says. Life is short and hard either way. So, if you can get it... get it! Play it, love it, smile.

J

Hi Rain, 

Take good care of yourself and quit smoking if you are still at it.  Your body needs lots of good lovin' now.  I pray all will be good for you.

Rimshot

  Glad it  all worked out for the better Rain. Hopes and prayers your way that everything will end up ok in the long term. Seems you have made the right changes to make cancer less of a possibility.

 Are you training by lifting your wife? :)