POP Quiz: Son of a Gunfighter

He wasn't really killed, it was just a dream?

Hey, man.  Nice shot.

Did he come to your home town looking to shoot you down?

I SWEAR

I think that running around shooting Sheriffs might be against the "No Politics" rule.  It might also be against the "No Littering" policy, too.  I'm pretty sure it's a violation of the "You broke it, you bought it" rule.

UbiquitousBubba
I think that running around shooting Sheriffs might be against the "No Politics" rule.  It might also be against the "No Littering" policy, too.  I'm pretty sure it's a violation of the "You broke it, you bought it" rule.

see above re:  CAPITOL O-FFENSE

 
In the days of the Wild West, there was a young cowboy who wanted more than anything to be the greatest gunfighter in the world. He practised every minute of his spare time, but he knew that he wasn't yet first-rate and that there must be something he was doing wrong.
 
Sitting in a saloon one Saturday night, he recognized an elderly man seated at the bar who had the reputation of being the fastest gun in the West in his day.
 
The young cowboy took the seat next to the old-timer, bought him a drink, and told him the story of his great ambition. Do you think you could give me some tips?" he asked.

The old man looked him up and down and said, "well, for one thing you're wearing your gun too high, tie the holster a little lower down on your leg."

The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his 44 and shot the bow tie off the piano player. "That's terrific!" said the cowboy, Got anymore tips for me?"

Yep," said the old man, "cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer hits it. That'll give you a smoother draw."

The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun in a blur, and shot a cuff-link off the piano player.

"Wow!" said the cowboy, "I'm learnin' somethin' here - got anymore tips?"

The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon, "See that grease over there? Coat your gun with it."

The young man went over to the can and smeared some of the grease on the barrel of his gun.

"No," said the old-timer, "I mean smear it all over the gun, handle and all."

"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the young man.

"No," said the old timer, "but when Wyatt Earp gets done playin' the piano, he's going to shove that gun up your ass, and it won't hurt as much"

SteveStrummerUK
 
In the days of the Wild West, there was a young cowboy who wanted more than anything to be the greatest gunfighter in the world. He practised every minute of his spare time, but he knew that he wasn't yet first-rate and that there must be something he was doing wrong.
 
Sitting in a saloon one Saturday night, he recognized an elderly man seated at the bar who had the reputation of being the fastest gun in the West in his day.
 
The young cowboy took the seat next to the old-timer, bought him a drink, and told him the story of his great ambition. Do you think you could give me some tips?" he asked.

The old man looked him up and down and said, "well, for one thing you're wearing your gun too high, tie the holster a little lower down on your leg."

The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his 44 and shot the bow tie off the piano player. "That's terrific!" said the cowboy, Got anymore tips for me?"

Yep," said the old man, "cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer hits it. That'll give you a smoother draw."

The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun in a blur, and shot a cuff-link off the piano player.

"Wow!" said the cowboy, "I'm learnin' somethin' here - got anymore tips?"

The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon, "See that grease over there? Coat your gun with it."

The young man went over to the can and smeared some of the grease on the barrel of his gun.

"No," said the old-timer, "I mean smear it all over the gun, handle and all."

"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the young man.

"No," said the old timer, "but when Wyatt Earp gets done playin' the piano, he's going to shove that gun up your ass, and it won't hurt as much"

I DON'T care what anybody says, that joke was funny as hell....
 
well strummy gave it his best SHOT

I nominate Craigs joke to be in the top two.

Beagle
Gimme back my bullets!  Put em back where they belong!

Were they the 38's?
 
(And, if they were for the singer's brother, they'd be special, ya?)
 

Must resist the urge to test for realness...