Plank Eye

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superdan54
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2018/11/05 17:54:34 (permalink)

Plank Eye

Hi all,
 
Just uploaded my first new track in a while. It's something of a rockgrass type tune...banjos & distortion in disharmony. Also, just a fair warning it's a little political/religious in nature in case you are turned off to those sorts of things. The title refers to the verse that points out the hypocrisy of calling out a speck on someone's eye, when we have a plank in our own.
 
Overall, I like the song but am not super impressed with my mix. Part of the problem is that I just have too much going on. I play a ton of instruments and like to incorporate them, but finding that little niche of sonic space for each seems to elude me. If anyone has any advice or even criticism of the mix I'd definitely love to hear it. Thanks!
 
https://soundcloud.com/one-man-dan-band/plank-eye
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    emeraldsoul
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    Re: Plank Eye 2018/11/06 03:02:00 (permalink)
    I'm into this. Here's a few mix ideas, don't know what you've tried. First off, 
    I assume your overbaked compression vocals are intentional, in the in-your-face slightly distorted style? I'd say they work that way, and sound nice against the clean background vocals. But the sacrifice is clarity and therefore lyric intelligibility. So look around at what other instruments you can drop in volume so that there's less competition for the vocals.
     
    That for me would be the drier picked banjo / mandolin lines, and the cymbals / hihats. Justa half a db off of those. For me around :30 that mandy is too loud. It's a nice part though.
     
    I really like your combo of rock funk folk. I'd compare to Blues Traveller or suchlike.
     
    Just after 1:06, that chorus's lyrics are hard to pick out. But during the verses, it's much easier.  2:14, those violin? parts offer direct competition with the vocal.
     
    The whole piece has a wonderfully live feel, the parts are excellent and well-conceived. Main vocal performance I think is really great. 
     
    An experiment might be to kill the violin part, and see what happens? Or whack 2 db off?
     
     
    Just some thoughts, worth what you paid for them . . . others will have more. Really great tune here.
     
    cheers,
    -Tom
     
     

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    #2
    Mannynyagain
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    Re: Plank Eye 2018/11/06 13:17:29 (permalink)
    A bit heavier and darker than what I usually listen to, but I like it. Lots of little surprises and several melodic variations. I get a kick out of the string sections - busy yes, but a nice bit of nuttiness in the middle of all this. It’s a pretty dense mix but it sounds intense and that’s in keeping with the lyrics. Good stuff.

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    #3
    Wookiee
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    Re: Plank Eye 2018/11/06 15:37:27 (permalink)
    All good advice from Tom, nothing I can add will keep the furry ears out for any possible remix.

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    daryl1968
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    Re: Plank Eye 2018/11/06 16:38:32 (permalink)
    I like this a lot - great energy
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    superdan54
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    Re: Plank Eye 2018/11/07 01:53:25 (permalink)
    Wow, thanks so much for the comments & advice! Tom, I applied pretty much every one of your suggestions, amazing what a small nudge of the fader here and there can do for a mix. Anyway, soundcloud sucks and won't let me upload a new version so I'm going with bandcamp instead. Still a little crowded, but I think better than before. I'll post the updated mix below. Thanks again!
     
    http://onemandanband.bandcamp.com/track/plank-eye
     
     
    #6
    bjornpdx
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    Re: Plank Eye 2018/11/07 02:56:13 (permalink)
    I really like the calm voice/angry voice changeups you have going. I'm still having trouble with lyric intelligibility on the 2nd version, although it is better than the 1st.  And saying that, I hope it's not just me who's having problems. If it is, then never mind what I just said. My hearing ain't what it used to be...

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    Lynn
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    Re: Plank Eye 2018/11/10 01:13:03 (permalink)
    I love this song and style very much.  I like the density of the mix, but as others have said, the vocals need to come up a few db's.  That's all I would change.  This is a pure gem!

    All the best,
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    Johnbee58
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    Re: Plank Eye 2018/11/10 03:20:14 (permalink)
    I take it the over compressed lead vocal is intended so I won't pick on it.  It's actually quite effective in a protest song.
    Great instrumentation and arrangement with the acoustic and electric instruments together.  I never heard of Rockgrass before, but I like what you have here.
     
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    thegaltieribrothers
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    Re: Plank Eye 2018/11/10 04:13:09 (permalink)
    More banjo plucking please.
     
    Good job!
    #10
    stevec
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    Re: Plank Eye 2018/11/28 20:16:00 (permalink)
    Late top the party, but...  I really liked this!  Your vocal performance was really good, and the blend of disparate instruments was just great - so weird yet so right.  
     
    Mix-wise I think the panned instruments are still just a touch loud in spots, but otherwise I enjoyed the density.
     

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