Please hate on my song - See Me

I posted this tune quite some time ago and it seemed like the more I worked on it, the worse it got. I finally put it away for several months in an attempt to flush the thing from my brain. So just this week I took the gauntlet up once again and I think I've moved the bar forward a bit with a slightly different arrangement and a new mix. Please give it a listen and let me hear your critiques before I give up on this as a bad job all around. :)
 
Thanks in advance!
 
https://www.reverbnation.com/kevola/song/27718951-see-me
 
 PS: I have to admit to a growing dissatisfaction with MP3 and what it does to the overall sound. It just seems to suck the life out of my mixes, quite a startling difference from the original wav file. Any pointers on how to compensate for mp3's vicious assaults would be most welcome.

No need to give up on it, as such, just say, "that's it, it's done." And leave it there... Move on...
 
It would be wrong of me to critique this song because I couldn't create anything anywhere near this quality. Song itself sounds fine, to me. I'm sure there are things you could do with the mix but I'd be at a loss as to what to do to improve it.
 
cheers,
 
andy

jamesg1213
Nice '60s sounding song Kevin. A few things on the mix and arranged;
 
The guitars are very brittle sounding, whereas the vocals are coming across quite 'middley' and muffled. I couldn't really make out the lyrics to be honest. Drums are OK, bass is fine. Lead guitars maybe a bit loud.
 
I liked the synth/guitar section at around 2:25, however, after that it kind of meandered on for a full minute and I was thinking 'where's the song gone?'
 
A bit more tweaking (sorry!) and you've got a good one here.
 
Regarding the MP3 thing, you shouldn't hear much difference between a WAV and a 320kbps MP3, but Reverbnation is no doubt streaming at a much lower rate than that.

Thanks for your comments, I do appreciate you taking the time to listen and to give your thoughts. Vocals are the hardest thing for me to get anywhere close to decent, and the issue you raise with the muffled sound is one of the things I'm really struggling with.  As for the guitars, I'm going for a jangly, sparkling kind of vibe and I'm thinking that if they sound brittle I'm not there yet. 
 
As for the arrangement, I have a friend who says the same thing, just different words. On the other hand, I like it. Maybe I listened to too much Jethro Tull, Yes and Kansas in my youth, I dunno. :)

dcumpian
Kevin,
 
I think I remember this from the last time you posted it. I like the song. The mix has two major problems:
 
1) The guitars are too far forward
2) The vocals are too far back
 
Fix those two things and the overall balance will be much better.
 
Regards,
Dan

 
Yeah, I'm back with it again and as always, your comments are incisive and very welcome. I think the core of the problem is the recording quality of the lead vocal. I think I should re-do the performance and then try your suggestions to see if I get less annoyed with the sound when I bring the vocals up. 

Yo Kev,
I still love this tune ! It sounds a lot like a 70's band such as Boston/Kansas doing an homage to a 60's band like Hollies/Byrds. I agree with the thought that the vocals need to be brought out. I have heard of the technique where you compress the entire instrumental track a bit (subtly in real time) while the vocals are sounding. I've never tried that, but it might work.  And the vocals sound like they have too much snot (compression).
 
Great track as it is.
 
Cheers,
 
Bert

Lynn
Kevin, this is a terrific song, and the fix might be easier than you think.  I think the instruments are in balance with each other, so just lowering them while raising the vocals might get you most of the way there.  Once you do that, then you may be able to better determine if the vocals need to be redone or just EQed differently.  Definitely worth the effort to make this a gem.

Thanks for lending me your ears, Lynn. My house is torn apart right now for getting new carpet installed so all my gear is packed away in the garage so I won't be able to give these suggestions a try for a few days. You guys are great!

Johnbee58
Has a combination Beach Boys/Hollies sound, especially with the vocal harmonies and falsettos.  Nice work, but agree with the assessment on the vocals need to be brought forward a bit and the guitars brought back.
 
John B.

Thanks, John! Vocals are by far the most difficult aspect of writing and recording, which is in turn already a very difficult process for me anyway, so I really don't look forward to doing the several bazillion takes it requires for me to get those vocals even close to decent-sounding. I will give that a try when I get my office back together. 

dcumpian
Kevin,
 
I think I remember this from the last time you posted it. I like the song. The mix has two major problems:
 
1) The guitars are too far forward
2) The vocals are too far back
 
Fix those two things and the overall balance will be much better.
 
Regards,
Dan
 
 

 
^^^^^^^
This
 

I remember this one! I still like it, but we could easily look at what is competing with the vocal. Lower the hi hat, and maybe cut a vocal hole through the guitar jangle.
 
Listen to the Chorus - your mix is much better there than the verses. Because the vocals are more prominent.
 
In the verses, and in that bridge, it's getting crushed by the hi hat.
 
I really like the divergent arrangement and the unexpected parts. For that instrumental stuff, I'd bring the bass up to drive the whole thing a little harder.
 
Your guitar jangles seem hard panned with two different takes? I think I hear the jangle on the left as out of tune just a hair. It's ok but if you lowered the left side jangle guitar volume, it might blend better. My mom always told me, "Son, you don't want your jangle sticking out" or words to that effect.
 
Definitely a thumbs up for this one, especially those harmonies.
 
-Tom

OK I Hate it, is that what you want.

Though quite possibly if you listen and apply the sage advice give by those above in preceding posts, who know far more than this furry alien, you could just have something I could learn not to hate.