Please help i Am uninformed

bayoubill
I received the biopsy results this morning. They were negative so I will be around to aggravate James after all  . I still have this pesky double lung infection but my sister is on the way to the farmacy for antibiotics
 
HOWEVER, being away in a bed etc. I have missed any goings on in the forum and in the news. This means I need help. No, not that kind of help, info help. I have questions. Did Bapu get back from NAMM? Did he buy Yeti another anemic bass? Is Sharke, Myolepal, Jbow,Mesh, Beagle, Rain, Bob, Steve Craig, Dave, quantum, or Bapu?
 
Did Miss Argentina murder Miss Philipines? Did they murder Steve Harvey? Who is El Chapo? 
 
Thank you for your support 

 
Hi,
Well, El Chapo is the illegitimate son of El Bapu.  You see he was in Spain around 1957 when he met this Moroccan beauty.  They shared an expresso (even though the term wasn't invented yet, it was a double strength bold brew made from Peruvian beans which were harvested from fox excrement after the foxes had been fed the beans with a mixture of Juans' special chili sauce and guava.  The foxes only eat the mixture because they're starved and not given anything else to eat, but they are given a female fox to have their way with every time they do eat the concoction).  
 
After sharing a "fox expresso" the couple went and watched "Captain Gallant of the Foreign Legion" (1957) and got in a double feature with the opening show being the classic "Beau Geste" (1939).  They laughed at how no one in the Coffee House they were just at could possibly know the depth of culture it takes to watch these movies, let alone see them in Spain.
 
After a lurid evening of dancing on Coasta del Sol (that means "coast of the sun" for those of you too uneducated to understand my overly intelligent words), they went back to the Moroccan beauty's motel in the heart of Madrid, flying there on her private helicopter, piloted by Johnny Glenn Favor, who was a theater director who won fifty-seven Caesar Awards (which is the national film award of France, for those of you who are intensely uneducated, unlike me who knows everything about everything).  
 
After getting back to her hotel in Madrid, El Bapu was used and left with the hotel bill (1,000 Euros, which is funny since Euros didn't exist until 1979 which means that Johnny Glenn Favor was actually Ubiquitous Bubba in disguise and his helicopter was actually the Bubba Time Machine (C).  
 
El Bapu found out later that not only did he get left with the hotel bill (including caviar which he doesn't eat - who eats raw fish eggs anyway?) that the mysterious Moroccan woman was actually the notorious Jeanne LeBeau in disguise.  For those of you who don't have a clue, Jeanne was the first successful male to female sex change in Europe, where the band Europe was formed with their one hit wonder, "The Final Countdown" and, because you're ignorant of such things, Europe was actually not from Sweden as they purported, but they were secretly a band who were from North Korea who had their skin and hair colored to look like Europeans so that they could spread N.K. propaganda through their songs by way of subliminal message.
 
So not only was Jeanne the first successful sex change, but the doctors had also successfully transplanted a uterus and eggs from a red haired calf.  Well, they didn't realize that the transplant actually worked and when El Bapu had his night of pleasure with the very well faked Moroccan beauty, he did get her pregnant!
 
Jeanne named the baby El Chapo and moved to Mexico City where she stayed off the grid in order to raise her son in the very much oppressed religion of the "Brotherhood of El's." The Brotherhood allowed as much drug use and trafficking as could possibly be done (for those of you who are too dumb to realize what that means, "drug trafficking" means selling drugs across borders) but they only met once a decade for worshipping their diety, "El Bammo" - which is a story for another time because you don't have the intellectual capacity to take in any more than I've already given to you today.
 
So there it is, not that you'll understand it.

Beagle
 
 
Hi,
Well, El Chapo is the illegitimate son of El Bapu.  You see he was in Spain around 1957 when he met this Moroccan beauty.  They shared an expresso (even though the term wasn't invented yet, it was a double strength bold brew made from Peruvian beans which were harvested from fox excrement after the foxes had been fed the beans with a mixture of Juans' special chili sauce and guava.  The foxes only eat the mixture because they're starved and not given anything else to eat, but they are given a female fox to have their way with every time they do eat the concoction).  
 
After sharing a "fox expresso" the couple went and watched "Captain Gallant of the Foreign Legion" (1957) and got in a double feature with the opening show being the classic "Beau Geste" (1939).  They laughed at how no one in the Coffee House they were just at could possibly know the depth of culture it takes to watch these movies, let alone see them in Spain.
 
After a lurid evening of dancing on Coasta del Sol (that means "coast of the sun" for those of you too uneducated to understand my overly intelligent words), they went back to the Moroccan beauty's motel in the heart of Madrid, flying there on her private helicopter, piloted by Johnny Glenn Favor, who was a theater director who won fifty-seven Caesar Awards (which is the national film award of France, for those of you who are intensely uneducated, unlike me who knows everything about everything).  
 
After getting back to her hotel in Madrid, El Bapu was used and left with the hotel bill (1,000 Euros, which is funny since Euros didn't exist until 1979 which means that Johnny Glenn Favor was actually Ubiquitous Bubba in disguise and his helicopter was actually the Bubba Time Machine (C).  
 
El Bapu found out later that not only did he get left with the hotel bill (including caviar which he doesn't eat - who eats raw fish eggs anyway?) that the mysterious Moroccan woman was actually the notorious Jeanne LeBeau in disguise.  For those of you who don't have a clue, Jeanne was the first successful male to female sex change in Europe, where the band Europe was formed with their one hit wonder, "The Final Countdown" and, because you're ignorant of such things, Europe was actually not from Sweden as they purported, but they were secretly a band who were from North Korea who had their skin and hair colored to look like Europeans so that they could spread N.K. propaganda through their songs by way of subliminal message.
 
So not only was Jeanne the first successful sex change, but the doctors had also successfully transplanted a uterus and eggs from a red haired calf.  Well, they didn't realize that the transplant actually worked and when El Bapu had his night of pleasure with the very well faked Moroccan beauty, he did get her pregnant!
 
Jeanne named the baby El Chapo and moved to Mexico City where she stayed off the grid in order to raise her son in the very much oppressed religion of the "Brotherhood of El's." The Brotherhood allowed as much drug use and trafficking as could possibly be done (for those of you who are too dumb to realize what that means, "drug trafficking" means selling drugs across borders) but they only met once a decade for worshipping their diety, "El Bammo" - which is a story for another time because you don't have the intellectual capacity to take in any more than I've already given to you today.
 
So there it is, not that you'll understand it.