There's so much more

Hey guys,
I realize this will make me sound like the old fart that I am but I'm a bit perturbed at how obsessed all 4 of my kids are with their electronic devices (ipod, computer games, etc).
This video will be my attempt to try to persuade them to consider using their devices a little less and experience life a little more (and maybe even ponder their spiritual beliefs).
To me, the video is as important (or even more so) than the music.
I'd appreciate any constructive criticism you may have...musically there are some things I will probably change as the visuals come together more (ie the outro will probably need to be shortened).
My main income is from video production/post production so suggestions in that area are welcome too.
The acting will be easy enough that I won't need any pro talent...my 18 year old daughter will be playing the girl and my friends and family will be acting out the choir part and I along with my 25 year old daughter (she sings her ass off) and my wife will sing the choir parts later...even though none of them know it yet : )
 
Thanks very much,
Randy
it's titled "there's so much more" at the top located at
http://youtube.com/crystalclearnm
 

Thanks Wook, if this works out as well as I'm hoping I will probably pay to have it (and others) mixed and mastered.
After I get to a certain point I just can't seem to make it any better (and sometimes make it worse)...I bring out something I want to hear more and take away from something else.
Any advice as to someone capable of helping me would be appreciated...my budget is very limited but I know I need help.
Thanks again bud,
Randy 

Sixfinger
You're going into it with great organization and vision. You'll do well :)
 

Thank you very much,
I don't know about the organization part (I'm known to be disorganized...you should see my studio : ) but the visualization (to me) is very strong and will convey the message well if tweaked and produced well.
Thanks again,
Randy

Thanks very much Steve,
I was concerned with that section because it switches back and forth from 4/4 to 5/4 meter and came close to changing it to all 4/4 but felt it works well with the lyrics/message (as airy-fairy as they may sound to some people).
Since I've posted this, I've decided to change the visuals there from "fast clips of fun active stuff" to the girl with the phone being shaken & slapped by "herself" (girl all the while concentrating on the phone)
It will be a green-screen/timing challenge but I think I (and my daughter) can pull it off without it looking toooo cheesy.
Thanks again Steve,
Randy 

The "chorus?" with the chords that bounce around in 5/4 was not a highlight for me, to be honest, but if you are feelin' it then there you go. I don't however think that part of your song would be "accessible" to your target audience, thematically. I could be wrong of course.
 
I think you may be right Tom, especially since I've had the same thought at times.
I imagine I will just lose the 5/4 altogether...AND after reading your post, I'm also thinking it should be a female singer instead of an "old" man
Ideally I would get my younger daughter (the one that will be acting) to sing it but she's always been intimidated by her siblings' talent and very shy when it comes to singing.
I'll probably wind up getting her older sister to sing it...she has a killer voice and has the ability to be silky smooth on the verses and belt the hell out of the chorus. 
Another good thing about her singing this would be that she is one of the "device addicted" kids I'm trying to reach  
Thanks very much Tom, your input is well received sir!

Thanks very much Tony!
Yeah, the vox was a one take scratch track recorded with a hand held mic sitting at my desk (computer noise and all) 
My daughter will sound much better and will work better visually since it'll represent the girl's "inner voice" singing the part.
I'll be back for advice on the final mix for sure (or hire someone).
Thanks again bud,
Randy

Thank you Phil, I appreciate the encouragement!
 
So far as the song itself goes, I kinda' got a bit lost when it went into the chorus.
 
Do you think that's because it goes back and forth between 5/4 and 4/4 or something else?
 
Personally I felt the message needed a more driving rhythmic feel behind it.
 
Do you mean on the verse too or just the chorus...or maybe the C section toward the end?
 
 Just my $.02.
 
Your input is very much appreciated!

SongCraft
Signed in, Liked and Subscribed to your YouTube, but I couldn't post the following comment:
 
"Refreshing, interesting, superbly crafted. Great selection of songs. Wish you all the best"
 
I paused Ad-Block, but still could not post a comment. Do you have it disabled on your YouTube?

I didn't intentionally disable comments but according to this thread it seems to be a YT/Google+/Chrome issue https://productforums.google.com/forum/#!topic/youtube/nEbg56w9yRY
Anyway, I see your comment here and VERY much appreciate it!
BTW, both of my daughters were here last night to hear it for the first time and both agreed to participate (my 18 year old acting out the "texting girl" and my 25 yr old singing).
I won't even need to transpose it, my older daughter can belt the chorus an octave higher!
I'm hoping we'll be able to lay her vox down soon but she is a working mom so it could be a while.
Anyway, thanks very much SongCraft , your comment really means a lot to me!
 
 

Take extra care with con artists who ply their trade under the guise of so-called record labels, they're getting too dang sneaky and ruthless nowaday
 
Thanks for the warning...I'm probably just gullible enough to fall for it : )

Really applies to the times.  My 5 year old Grandson is a whiz already on tablets and computers.  I am trying to get him to do a bit more outside stuff.  it's like breaking a drug addict!  he's a really good boy and is responding.  
Your song is nicely done.  I'd love to see the movies but your "screen writer) notes were actually letting me imagine the video.  I liked this.