What it means to be English

He even put that into his book.  Love it!

I think I've all but lost my English politeness after more than a decade in New York. And it gets me into trouble sometimes. A couple of years ago I went to see the great comic Bill Bailey perform at NYU, by myself. Paid for the ticket online and printed it out. That's my Friday evening sorted.

So I go to the theater and sit in my seat. After a while a young lady walks up an says excuse me, I think you're in my seat. Not a chance, says I, this is my seat. It says so on the ticket. That's weird says she, it says so on my ticket as well. So we went on like this for a while with me getting stroppier and stroppier to the point where other people in the theater were watching us. What the hell was this girl's problem? Go sort it out with the box office, they've obviously made a mistake and sold the same seat twice, but hey, that's not my problem and I was here first. HA!

So she asks to see my ticket. Be my guest says I and hands it over.

"You idiot," she said, "this ticket is for SATURDAY." And so it was. Utter humiliation. Cockiness FAIL. All of a sudden my simpering British meekness kicked in and I had to walk away red faced with my stupid tail between my stupid legs. Luckily I found an empty seat in a corner and caught the show there. But sheesh, how EMBARRASSING. I still cringe when I think about walking away from that seat with everyone looking and smiling.

craigb
Funny story, but... How did you even get into the theater in the first place? 

Well clearly the kids checking the tickets at the door weren't looking closely enough. I bet they rarely check the date.