When We're Gone

When We're Gone

https://soundcloud.com/orygun/when-were-gone

Inspired by  Dust In The Wind by Kansas.

Not ready for prime time, esp the lyrics, but I wanted to get an  opinion on the vocal track.
I used Melda MUnison to get a double tracking/harmonizing kind of effect and I thought it made a significant improvement on my vocal.
Comments and suggestions much appreciated.  Thanks for listening.



Indiginus Strum Maker
OTS Strawberry
Kirk Hunter strings
NI Scarbee MM Bass
Addictive Drums
Vir2 Acou6tics


A moment of a life caught in a photograph
A whisper from the past
This is you in a time so long ago.

Faces  so familiar
You used to  know their names
Now they're gone
Just a picture remains

All that I am are the memories
Memories of my days
And that world in my mind
Will fade away

When it is over
All the  worries, all the fighting
Waste of time and our time is all gone  

All that I am are the lessons learned  from  life.
All  those days now forgotten  
But I had lived through every one

A picture of a moment
Of a day
Thrown away

And at the end when our time slips away  
Then will we know
How precious was today

All we believed to be real all life long
All an illusion   
At the end when we're gone

thanks Steve
Yeah, I need to do some de-essing for sure or play with the EQ.   I agree the lead gtr needs some toning down.

Thanks David
I appreciate the comment on the vocal treatment.
And yeah, totally agree with the rest of what you said.

The lyrics I wrote were supposed to be in keeping with the "Dust in the Wind" view,
cliched as they are. And though we've heard the observations before (all we are is dust in the wind...) the truth in those words still smack you in the head if you think about it.

Not really my kind of music, but I appreciate the message and sentiment! Don't know if I like the vocal doubling or not. It was neat, but I think what might help you more than anything is to sing loud and from your gut. Pretend you're Bing Crosby.  (Yeah, like I should be giving out advice on vocals....)
 
Bill

sock monkey
Thanks for the suggestions. My vocals do tend to be too much forward. I don't even notice it until days later or someone points it out.

Bill
Well, I don't know about Bing Crosby. I actually took singing lessons once, not that it shows or anything.

Freddy
Thanks for listening.

Nice tune - drums need to come out front and up in the mix. Interesting tune - well written.

I agree with the comments above that the drums are a bit distant sounding and the lead guitar a little loud, but mix-wise that's about it for me.  I did like the lyrics - then again I usually do!  As for the vocals themselves, I'm with Bill - I can't decide if I like the doubling or if it's distracting.   Or maybe it's both, depending on the line/phrasing...   
 
Just curious - have you tried singing in a higher or lower register?   I know you do have a naturally breathy voice, I'm just wondering if you could get more of that Bing Thing going if singing outside your comfort zone.  Just a thought.