I hired No One to work for me once. At first, it seemed that it would work out well. I didn't pay him, since he worked for free. He liked my cooking. He even wanted to listen to me ramble on an on for hours at a time.
In the end, it didn't work out, though. He broke things periodically. I would be asked if people were supposed to believe that No One had done that and I would answer, "Yes". He was the only one who believed me, of course.
I still talk to him all the time. People ask me who I'm talking to and I tell them. That seems to prompt them to inquire as to whether or not I really am a Doctor.
I just like the masks and the parking spaces.