I used to think that too myself
Danny until my son got me into this stuff and not only that he showed me and I can hear it big time. Same stick, same drum, two players:
Stick holding point. The position of the fulcrum in relation to the stick. The grip at this fulcrum point. Tight or looser. The shape of the hand around the fulcrum. This effects tone of the drum hit.
(this can be very obvious on cymbals) The energy behind the stick stroke. Finger control or wrist or arm movement. All add varying degrees of power behind the stroke. Major differences here!
The way the stick bounces off the head.
Kick pedal. Heel down or heel up. Leaving the beater buried in the head or let it bounce off. (Major sonic differences here) Weight behind the kick. Just using the foot, leg weight behind, body weight behind. Kick tone gets effected here.
These are all very complex aspects to drumming and this is the sort of stuff Jazz players get taught. (Many) Rock drummers are oblivious to this sort of stuff. With respect
Danny you are a very fine guitarist first and foremost (and a very decent drummer too!) but you are not in the league of players like my son for example who has mastered amazing amounts of technique control in the areas I have mentioned above. Drumming is more than just time. It takes a long time to master this sort of stuff well.
Technique would be a good word to describe it I suppose.
Here is an interesting article that relates technique to drum sound:
http://www.mikejamesjazz.com/drum_sound.html The playing the groove the feel, the sense of groove all come out and it's a bit like Frank with his guitars. The sound of a great drummer just seems to ring through for some reason and just over power any kit. The actual playing can override the drum sound to a certain extent. I for one sound like me no matter what kit I play. There is something hard to pinpoint that, just moves with the drummer onto any drum kit. Kenny Clare showed me that in that drum workshop. Gadd would sound great and the drums would sound great no matter what drums he plays.
When masterful drummers encounter a bad sounding head or drum they seem to know what to do or how to extract a better sound out of it.
But yes I also agree that drums are one of those instruments that have many variables and they too all effect the sound. I think a good compromise might be it is a combination of both. The drums themselves and technique.
Here is a good article I stumbled across regarding tuning more so than technique.
http://www.drummingweb.com/tuning.htm Another good drum tuning article:
http://www.mikejamesjazz.com/drum_tuning.html Sound on Sound has also produced some great stuff on drum tuning.
http://www.soundonsound.com/sos/aug10/articles/drum-tuning.htm