Hey, everyone! So I noticed that a lot of times when listening to a mix I know (that is, my own) I completely lack the ability to listen for what sounds good or bad in the mix overall. I can definitley do it with commercial releases or others' projects, but how can I develop a critical ear for my own mixes?

It comes with practice bud, Import a similar song into your project & listen to it off and on during your mix session, that may help.  Sometimes you have to put the controls down and just listen.  I know as I learned more and more, I found that if I had the console view up I would heard 1 thing & tweak it, rather than listen to the whole mix, then start at the top and the next thing that jumped out would get my attention until I fixed it... and so on.  I would think the mix was good until I exported it and then just sit & listen to the 2 track wave (where I couldn't really tweak the tone on the snare or, vocal level etc.) and bigger issues would hit me like a 2x4 to the face...  I'd wonder  How did I miss that!??    You get target fixation and never see the stuff in front of your face/ears.
 

I don't think there is a final mix. It is what you hear vs. what others hear. If enough others hear it and like it, then it will be okay, and the few who do not like it, will be the few.
 
So first it has to sound like you want it, the rest is relative. No need to drive yourself crazy, but being in a meditative state may help, or else turn up the volume and stomp around the room and strut your stuff. If you stomp around while other people are there and claim how great it is, some people may actually leave thinking the same thing. Others will say it is okay, and still a few will not like it.
 
At least if you have several mixes, you can get opinions by the other people who want to put up with annoying them with all the mixes asking which one they think is better. But I guess you need a crowd to do that with, so first that may not happen and you have to imagine a crowd that will like it.
 
Whatever happens you will never be exactly right probably, but then who knows, so that will be that.
I hope that I have not made any sense to you, because your mix may not be what I hear or want.
Maybe some other people will want it though!

 
Or we can all leave and say "eh?"
 
Or I can go to the song thread more often and usually say the same thing I usually say - "It's fine" or point out something about it perhaps, but most of the time, asking me for an opinion depends on which day it is, so perhaps I should listen to more music, but then there is only so much time, and that will be that.
 

One thing I do do sometimes is actually turn off the monitor and turn around or pull my focus away from the music a bit and see what sticks out. It works decently well, but I also need better headphones.
Thanks for the suggestions! I have heard a lot about the method of running a pro mix alongside mine… I have to try it, because it's one have yet to actually employ! I do like the idea of listening EVERYWHERE and getting a sense that everyone's view of the ideal mix will be different… But it leaves the question of "how can I really visualize my mixes as a whole song and no longer as 'x' chunks of music/instruments that need to be revised? 
 

but being in a meditative state may help.
 
You know what that means? Hypnotizing yourself. (it is not scary, and actually you have done it many times listening to music, some familiar piece of music you like, and have listened to the total mix of the song).
 
A deep relax feeling which can be had, by cancelling out any thoughts that come into your mind, not drifting in thought, not listening hard to the music, letting the music flow in the air surrounding you. Forgetting the adjustments for a while and knowing that if something sounds wrong that listening a few more times may have you know what to do to fix it. Listening to it again afterwards, and still listening to it if you change it a few more times, perhaps over a few days, but mainly just not drifting in thought, forgetting thinking, and being deeply relaxed. At first that may not seem possible, but it can be done by anyone, usually they have negative thoughts saying that they can not do it, or that is not me. First of all you have to say after catching that you had a negative thought to say to yourself and to no one else "cancel, cancel" after 21-30 days, they will disappear in that sense then you will be relaxed easier, but still not focused. Then you will learn by yourself to focus which means being grounded in purpose especially when relaxing a couple times a day (or even once) in a quiet environment for about 20 minutes. Then after all that, when you listen to your music you will hear it differently than before, and what happens after that is up to you. Do you tap your feet, get up and dance, move around while retaining being more relaxed, or do you confer to someone else that whatever you are doing is just you, but may not be what they do, as they may look at you weird, but that will be that.
 

 
In other words, take a break from yourself periodically.
Loosen up, wind down, chill out, break on out.
Be the mother of invention, be a mother - wait maybe better not to do that, because some become a mother-fu****. Wait maybe I better quit, and you can think about it on your own time.
 
Some people have a few drinks, but actually that will not help as much because it is too easy to overdo anything especially mixing down.
 
Caution with all of it, don't want to beat your head against the wall too hard or too much.
Not good to knock yourself out, or pass out on the floor not breathing.
Whatever!

 
And try not to be a dork about any of it.
And be total as in total control.
 
 
 

That may NEVER Go away dude.  Even before I got into recording... I'd go into a studio to record my stuff and even though it was done & done well, It never (to me) sounded like a whole entity.  I always heard it as "the guitar riff I wrote on the beach that day, with lyrics I wrote and revised over the next 2 weeks, and that drum part the drummer struggled with for months, and that one damn note the bass player kept arguing with me about that's not really wrong, but it AIN'T RIGHT EITHER!"     You get my point.   And as an engineer working on your own stuff, it's emphasized even more for me.  I hear all those types of things and now I also think....  "I knew I should have changed that Snare head!" and the tone of that guitar was  good but man...  the mic position could have been a little better".     I can admire other peoples mixes but only criticize my own.   The things I hear in them make me want to throw excuses out there before I even hit play to show someone, when in reality...  they almost never hear what is bothering me, and I generally get compliments.  it's your stuff and unlike where a painter eventually can call something done...  Audio could potentially be tweaked until eternity and never be considered finished by the engineer.  Generally, when I am recording another band/client..  I force myself to stop trying to make it even better about 2 revised mixes AFTER the client is satisfied and feels it's done.  Then they are just floored with the results and I feel better about them I guess so I let it roll.  haha. 

Oooh, it reminds me- I tend to REALLY hear my vocals and melodies! I'll listen, but feel the groove in the melody so much that I can't really focus on the mix! Perhaps it'd be wise to listen to both with and without vocals? Nah. idk. We'll see.
But spacealf, I like that reply! I do need to learn the art of relaxation….. I'm sure it will be extremely useful! I need to find out what works best for me in regards to stopping, slowing myself down, and just enjoying the work as a work.
Chuck, that is actually something that hasn't plagued me as much- I'll usually notice small things like wrongly-sung or played notes and stuff, but my biggest problem is possibly my self-obsession with my music! XD I lose track of listening to it ALL- and then I only hear my vocals going and just how clever I thought I wrote a line or how well I thought a vocal came out, etc.
I tried listening to some stuff today and a method I've seen works a little bit for me is to focus on something else in the mix- bass, a synth, rather than my vocals- it somehow lets me hear the comprehensive mix better and takes my mind away from vox. I'm still working on leaning my ear to other parts of the music, though. Thanks guys, keep the replies coming!

It does come w/ time, and practice.  You have to learn what to listen for and to and focus.  Go through the song and listen for one or two things.  How does this instrument/line sound in comparison.  Does the guitar sound in the lead sound just about as loud as the vocal that dropped out?  A dB or 2 can make a difference as to how smooth the transition sounds.
 
But it is hard w/ your own baby to listen to it objectively.
 
I recorded a cover of "This is love" by PJ Harvey last year.  I had listened to her version a million times, but could never tell if one part was an organ or guitar.  After working on our version and listening to it a mere 1000 times, when I went back to the original I could hear the organ clear as day.  Sometimes it is just amount of time spent w/ things, which helps dull your appreciation of your own genius so you can hear the song as others do.
 
@

The big problem as I see it is being able to distance yourself from the song. It is, after all, your "baby" since it was crated by you and from the first moment you liked it enough to record it, you fell in love and are now biased.  Just like we tend to overlook the things we don't like in a new relationship at the very beginning, we do the same thing with our music. That's why there are songs that get posted that really need lots of tender loving care.
 
It takes practice and effort to really look at your own stuff objectively. For that reason, it is always better to work with another writer. They tend to keep you from falling too deeply in love with those things that are better off changed or done differently or left out entirely.
 
Even having an "uninvolved 3rd party" listen and give objective advice helps....and that's what tends to happen here in the songs forum. The trick is to learn to hear what "they" will hear and comment on, before you post it up. That takes time and practice.
 
More than once I have posted a song, having a hunch or straight up knowing that there was an issue with one thing or another in that song....and sure enough, the forum folks came back and nailed it thereby confirming what I already knew. The proper course of action would have been to fix it before posting it rather than being lazy and thinking that the "problem" was a nit and other's wouldn't notice it. After being in the forum for a while, you get a good idea whose advice is dead on and worth listening to.
 
hope this helps you a bit.
 
 

Guitarhacker
 After being in the forum for a while, you get a good idea whose advice is dead on and worth listening to.

Ain't it da truth.... Ain't it da truth!!!