craigb
...The cause of the accident was a small guy, in a small car with a big mouth...

''Hey Craig! Are you racist?''

Ya. 
 
E.T. go home! 

Jackson,
 
Never had the honor to drive in China, but cruised around Italy. Like you said, there are some quirks in the roads sometimes bad quirks, but got to comment on the gas stations.
 
Here in Oregon USA, you can't touch a gas pump unless you are on an Indian reservation. There, it costs you about another 5 cents per gallon if you don't pump your own. Confuses a lot of tourists and even us locals.
 
Had to get gas today at a place with the poor kid being dragged overwhelmed from car to car. All the grief for minimum wage. My gas was dispensed, but by law I can't touch the pump or even put the gas cap back on. Took 10 minutes extra to get him to take out the pump. Told him I would have hung everything back to help him out. Under penalty of getting terminated, he confided that he would have appreciated the help and would have not turned me in for the crime.
 
Most Oregon gas stations have you by the balls. You can fry in hell before anyone is there to help you. I think they celebrate in making you wait. The one power they have over other human beings. Not that there are not good souls out there on the job, but they are in the minority unfortunately.
 
First entry into Italy was a blessed shock experience. Drive into a gas station and the whole family is out there for you. Mom, Dad, the kids. Checking your fluid levels, cleaning the windows. Tire pressure if the tire looked down. One stop shopping to the level of their capacity. Focused and motivated to serve. You left the station with a full tank of gas, but something more.
 
John

@JohnKenn
 
They do the mandatory gas pump attendant thing in NJ. Always thought it was some kind of mob action. 
 
Hmm... what do you know about witness relocation in Oregon? 

jackson white
Hmm... what do you know about witness relocation in Oregon? 

I don't know about that, but they MUST have a witless protection program out here!

Not long after I bought my current Telecaster, my building super came in to make a repair (a radiator, not the Tele) and as he was leaving, he knocked over a mic stand which fell onto the Tele and left a little ding on the body. I was completely over the moon and invited the super to be godfather to my first born child, if I ever have one. 

Witness relocation out here means getting lost in the woods.
Wife is on jury duty for the month. We relocated between counties last year getting out of it until now.
 
 

@JohnKenn
 
A strategy for getting out of jury duty that's worked for me is to show up a day early. They've always said, 'since you're here, we'll add you to the list for today'. And you end up at the end. Never been called in the 3x I've tried this, dismissed by mid morning. Easier than moving. 
 
Then again, how did I manage to be there a day early...  

sharke
Not long after I bought my current Telecaster, my building super came in to make a repair (a radiator, not the Tele) and as he was leaving, he knocked over a mic stand which fell onto the Tele and left a little ding on the body. I was completely over the moon and invited the super to be godfather to my first born child, if I ever have one. 

Well done.  Teles should never be pristine, they're workhorses.