I did a Steinman with this one and took a regular expression and turned it into a song. It's one of 4 songs that I'm thinking on releasing and have be it for me on the "songs", so I need your brutally honest opinion on basically anything.
 
https://soundcloud.com/so...-what-she-said/s-YR19P
 
New vocal (25/2)
https://soundcloud.com/so...hat-she-said-1/s-OtFix
Final Mix
https://steenelm.bandcamp...ck/thats-what-she-said
 
 

I loved the simplicity of this song it really works. One of those songs that needs real drums, be worth looking into that. Bit more passion from the vocal delivery, tell me what the words mean! the tone of the vocal is really nice. This song is authentic because of the use of a "regular expression".
 
Cian

whack
I loved the simplicity of this song it really works. One of those songs that needs real drums, be worth looking into that. Bit more passion from the vocal delivery, tell me what the words mean! the tone of the vocal is really nice. This song is authentic because of the use of a "regular expression".
 
Cian

Thanks for your input. I know what you mean about the vocal. I try so hard to be on key, that it can be a bit emotionless. I plan to take another crack at the vocals when my throat stops hurting.

I would not be worried about using touch of Melodyne to bring the vocals closer when you do let your emotion in.  It is not as if you do not check the tuning on your guitar now is it?

Will keep the furry ears open for the remix.

I transposed this 5 semitone up to get a better vocal, but not sure if it's better:
 
https://soundcloud.com/so...hat-she-said-1/s-OtFix

Steen, I want to start by saying that I like this song, and I much prefer the newer version.  It was well worth your time to redo this, and now your voice has some flavor that works for you.   As Cian said, the drums might be worth your time to give this production a bit more depth.  Otherwise, good job.

If you replace the drums, or even throw in a fill once in a while, it'd be a major step up. It's a pleasant tune, certainly!
I like the spacey synth pad, and to go along with, maybe your drums could be electronic or such. Go 80's!
 
cheers,
-Tom

Lynn
Steen, I want to start by saying that I like this song, and I much prefer the newer version.  It was well worth your time to redo this, and now your voice has some flavor that works for you.   As Cian said, the drums might be worth your time to give this production a bit more depth.  Otherwise, good job.

emeraldsoul
If you replace the drums, or even throw in a fill once in a while, it'd be a major step up. It's a pleasant tune, certainly!
I like the spacey synth pad, and to go along with, maybe your drums could be electronic or such. Go 80's!
 
cheers,
-Tom

Thanks for the comments. I'm working a bit more on the drums. It's just never been my strong point.


Steen

Final mix out:
https://steenelm.bandcamp...ck/thats-what-she-said
 
New vocals and a bit more variation in the drums. It's not going to get any better.

Your link on top of the page takes you to a song called Nomansland.

Now that I found this link, I'm listening to this also.

I like this song quite a bit.  The lyrics are "real" and are really well done.  I like the vocals quite a bit.  They remind me of some 80s post punk groups like The Alarm.  I love the simplicity of the instrumentation, including the drums.  To me, to have anything more going on would detract from the song itself.  

My only crit (and I know you said it's the final mix and it's not going to get any better), you can hear extra vocal noises like lip smacks and breaths between some of the lines and especially at the beginning before the vocals start.  If it's not too late, I'd go in and try to edit those out.  

Honestly, that's my only crit.  As for the song writing and instrumentation, I absolutely am in love with this song.  It's like my life before I got married.  I can definitely relate to the lyrics.