"It's the gas, doctor. I have these farts all the time. You know the type--silent but deadly."

"Yes, I understand your problem with flatus, Mrs. Jones, but you also seem to have gotten a little deaf."

World's Shortest Musician Joke:

   "A drummer walks past a bar."

 
 
  
 
 
 
 
 
 

 
 
  
  
 
 
 

Frankie my bass player was beating up the drummer the other day.
I asked Frankie what the problem was.
He said the drummer had de-tuned one of his strings - and he wouldn't tell him which one...

Dog goes into a post office to send a telegram
 
He writes
 
Woof Woof
     Woof Woof
Woof       Woof
woof  Woof Woof
 
The post office worker says you've only got  9 woofs there
you can have 10 woofs for the same price - do you want me to add another one??
 
but it wouldn't make sense, replies the dog!!
 
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Two cannibals are eating a clown.  One of them says to the other, "Does this taste funny?"

 
 

 
 
 

Stevie Wonder is playing a concert in Tokyo, and asks for requests from the audience.

Little old Japanese guy stands up and says 'Play a jazz chord!!'

Stevie is quite impressed by the man's knowledge of his musical abilities, so launches in to an extended jazz solo..the crowd goes wild.

Little Japanese guy 'No, no..play a jazz chord!!' Irritated, Stevie tries again, with some wild solo-ing.

Again..'Play a jazz chord!!'

Stevie's had enough now 'OK smart arse, you come up and do it if you're so clever!'

'No, no' explains the old guy...


''Play a jazz chord to say I ruv you!!'

 
"Hey Bobby, do you know what this ADHD is all about?"
 
"Let's play on the swings"