An elderly man goes into a brothel and tells the madam he would like a young girl for the night. Surprised, she looks at the ancient man and asks how old he is. 

'I'm 90 years old,' he says. 

'90!' replies the woman. 'Don't you realize you've had it?' 

'Oh, sorry,' says the old man. 'How much do I owe you?' 

Son:   'Mum, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.' 

Mom:  'Well, you have done the right thing.'   

Son:    'But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.'   

OldGeezer

ORIGINAL: rsp@odyssey.net

Then there was the,

Insomniac, dyslexic, agnostic.

He laid awake nights, wondering if there really is a Dog.

Randy

I take great offence to that. My mom is a proud member of D.A.M. (Mothers Against Dyslexia).

I'm the president of D.A.M.A.D.D

Drunks Against Mothers Against Drunk Driving

What do you call a fish with no eye?

A fsh.

ericyeoman


What do you call a fish with no eye?

A fsh.

 
Eric's just got back from the boozer then 
 
 
 

My last girlfreind had a facial tick. It would get much worse during sex. I nicknamed her Timex because she could take a licking and keep on ticking.

Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. 

There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.  No pun in ten did.

bapu


There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.  No pun in ten did.

 
That's fpunny

At the fruit stall, the apples were arranged in neat rows, stalks uppermost, the oranges artfully balanced into tempting pyramids, the bananas hung prettily from gleaming stainless steel hooks.

The strawberries, however, were thrown carelessly into last years cardboard trays at the back of the stall.


No punnet tended.