Did you hear about the one-armed butler - He could take it but he couldn't dish it out.............

Thank you

Garry Kiosk

A sadist and a masochist are walking down the sidewalk.
The sadist lights a cigarette, turns, and puts it out in masochists eye.
The masochist says,"Ooooh, do that again!"
The sadist says, "No".

A Turd and a Will Not are out for a night out. They come up to a bar. Will Not says "I will not go in there". Turd says "OK, let's go". Will Not says "I will not". Turd says "I know who you are, let's go"...............

A student decides he wants to be the best proctologist ever, so he goes down to the morgue after class to get some practice. The first corpse he looks at has a cork in his butt! He thinks "that's odd", so he yanks it out and to his amazement, music starts playing.

"...On the road again, I just can't wait to get on the road again..."

The guy flips! He gets the chief coroner and brings him to the table.

"Check this out!" he says, and yanks the cork back out", and sure enough...."On the road again..."

The Coroner looks at him and says "So?"
"So?!! Isn't that the most incredible thing you've ever seen?
"What are you talking about?" says the coroner... "Any ass-hole can sing country music!"

Q: What's 50 feet long, gray, and smells of urine?

A: Country line-dancing at the seniors home.

A door to door salesman is working a nice nieghborhood one day, when he walks up to a home and rings the doorbell.

A young boy about 13 answers the door, wearing a womans bra, a thong, and smoking a cigar.

The salesman looks the kid over, and stammers "is your mommy or daddy home?"

The kid takes the cigar from his lips and says "what the **** do you think!

Randy

For the Brits...

Boy says to his mother "Mum, I've got the biggest p**ck at nursery school - is it because I'm a Northerner?"

"No son, it's because you are 28 years old"

ok cowboy.. heres a few more to add to your list.

what you call a guy with a seagul on his shoulder.. *long pause* cliff

what you call a guy with a shovel in his head............ *tumble weed* ... doug

ORIGINAL: Fog


what you call a guy with a shovel in his head............ *tumble weed* ... doug

What about a guy who hasn't got a shovel in his head?

Douglas?

Edit: If so, it should be the winner given the title of this thread.