+1 to lowering the compression somewhat.
 
You've got lots of cool ideas in this tune, and I totally can hear the Edie Brickell reference mentioned earlier, though I hear some Joni Mitchell in there as well. Ki
 
Mixwise, the balance is pushing to the right a bit with the reverb on the drums.
 
Regards,
Dan

Something about this song is so bizarre and just not right...  which is what it makes it so cool.   
 
I really liked the way you've left the tempo completely free to follow the story - that's some good stuff.  And I think it helps to launch things dementedly over the top, almost like a circus, without sounding anything like a circus.  If that makes sense.   I can imagine this being used in TV or a movie...

Keep doing what you are doing.
 
Unless you are sending your songs to LANDR, which if so it's not helping at all. You are acoustic and vocal, and the overcompression is crushing the dynamics (the louds and the softs) . Listen to your high hats, they are a'flanging and a'sizzling but they are not a'breathin'
 
Love your voice, your cadances that evolve and devolve, your lyrics, your vaguely Eastern European gypsy quirk.
 
 
The obligatory Bjork references have yet to be made, so I'll offer that up.
 
cheers, glad I got a chance to hear this.
 
-Tom
 
 

Dcumpian, stevec and emeraldsoul: Thank you so much for your kind words and good advice! I hope to get a chance either today or tomorrow to try to kill all that over compression and then maybe even put a link to the newer version here in this thread.
I know I keep saying it, but I value your comments very much.
LJ
 

Have tried to improve this, using the very useful comments from Forum members (I'm pretty sure my effort wasn't entirely successful).
 
Anyway, thank you for being such a good bunch :)
 
LJ
 

Clever song. I loved the lyrics and tempo changes. The mix is coming through fine I can hear all the elements clearly especially the vocals. I enjoyed it very much. Thanks.

Thanks very much, MCi. I'm especially glad you liked the lyrics. Wow, you're all the way down under! It's still amazing to me how this forum brings together people from all over to share their music and Sonar experiences.
Thanks again for the kind words!
LJ
 
 

Hey -- very nice.  (I do wish you'd posted the lyrics somewhere as sometimes it was hard to make 'em out.)  This is a very good demo of your song -- your vocals are spot on and the arrangement is terrific...sort of Melanie hugs Kate Bush and hand-in-hand they join Bjork and take a walk down Broadway...ahem...anyway, very creative and well done.  !!
 
Allan
===

Aw, thank you very much, Allan. Your description made me laugh, too - I'd like to see them take that walk for real
LJ
 

Hello Laura,
 
I've heard the first mix when you first posted it and I have listened to your new mix a few times over the past few days ..
I've been jammed up time wise w my internet free time to post...

Yes , the second mix sounds a lot better too me ...
I happen to like your musical orbit . You show a lot of solid musical creativity and vocal expression in your new song
 
I certainly dig the fact that you are full of surprises on where you take your music. Also love that you are so willing to take musical risks and go too unexpected places with all the musical twists and turns you do ...
I feel it gives your music a dimension of vibrancy and movement . Also I feel it gives your music  a unique stamp / form of personal expression .
By that I mean , now that I've heard you a few times with a couple of tunes , there is no mistaking it is you ....as the Artist .
 
Say, while I have your ear , can you please do me a favor ? Can you please ask your 2 lovely cats to stop trying to hypnotize me while I'm listening to your song
 
all the best,
 
Kenny