It sounds like a lot of work went into this, but in the end it was a collection of pointless randomness. At the 2:30 mark the song rhythmically falls apart a bit and it doesn't sound intentional. If the music was to be a clever following of the changing direction of the lyrics, it missed the mark. It would be better if you could take the listener in a direction and bring them back to a focus point, then another direction, then back and then maybe a different direction, otherwise it ends up to be a musical mess.

Mark - thanks!  It was a fun song to do.  I did make a pass thru the drum MIDI track for the first rev, but I will certainly make another go at it to see if I can loosen up more of the tight bits.
 
Kenny - thank you!  I'm glad you enjoyed it.  
 
Pete - thanks for your input.  All of changes were completely intentional... I try to approach things as each instrumentalist might do, so the rhythm was also as it wanted to be in my head.   Subjective and all. 
 

Nice work Steve. Being a bit of a bass player, I really appreciated the effort on the bottom end. Genesis, maybe? 10CC, could be. The great thing about a song like this is, the more listens, the more you can find and appreciate. I will leave it to others to comment on the mix, but I enjoyed the journey. Always a pleasure mate.

Thanks, Wayne!   While I don't consider myself a bassist per se I really do enjoy playing bass.   I also have a thing for layers, so I appreciate the comments.   
 
Happy new year.