I assumed I had a porpoise once. I don't know why. I mean, I didn't have a place for him to swim or a reason to keep him. He wasn't a great conversationalist. Most of our discussions involved famous Viking philosophers. He used to wear a water tank on his back that I rigged up to connect to a helmet. He liked wandering around out of the water. To my surprise, he was a great driver. I had thought the pedals might give him some trouble, but he adapted pretty fast. I got used to riding shotgun because he always hogged the keys. I don't know. It was nice being driven around by my own aquatic chauffeur.
I guess that I enjoyed being porpoise driven.
(This is what happens when we dig up old freds.)