Misposted.
 
Is that a word?
 
 

Okay. Here's one that used to get me in trouble all of the time. As a child, I was frequently asked some variation on the question, "Are you stupid?"
 
There is no right answer to this question. No matter what I said, things always took a turn for the worse. Here are some of the answers I tried with no success.
 
"If so, how would I know?"
"If I am, and you have to ask me, what does that say about you?"
"Not when compared to the rest of my gene pool."
"I guess there is a family resemblance."
"Apple. Tree."
"Give me a minute and I'll try to explain it to you in small words."
"No. Are you?"
"Violence never solved anything." (I'll admit that this was a weak ploy only used in desperation after one of my other answers triggered the "beat until he stops quivering" response.)
 
Inevitably, my answers would usually prompt a followup query along the lines of, "Are you trying to get smart with me?"
 
No Right Answers.
 
Hours later, once I could tolerate the sensation of pants with only minimal screaming, someone would remind me that all of this could have been avoided if I had just learned to keep my mouth shut. 
 
 

Beagle
 
"could (should/would) of" instead of "could (should/would) have"
 

 
That's the one. I hate that.
 
That, and the current trend of answering any question by starting the answer with 'So..' and ending on the upward inflective..
 
'What are you dong today James?'
 
'So, I'm trimming the hedges?'
 

Like, what's wrong with that, you know?

Starting declarative sentences with "So..." has become so ubiquitous that stopping it will be like trying get toothpaste back in the tube.  This alone has made life almost unbearable for me.  

My mayte Jaynes sews hedges?

Text speech mixed with suburban "cool" slang is a blight on society.
 
I mean, "LOL, it's totes whack, yo. Meh."
 
(Actually, I do like, "Meh." I feel it perfectly sums up a sense of apathy completely devoid of any hint of interest or emotion.)

If you're going with suburban slang......Bye Felicia!!
 
When a person does or says something that pisses you off, instead of letting their irrelevant butt (edited) get to you, their name becomes "Felicia". You can then say the words "Bye Felicia" as a way of dismissing them from your life, and showing them they hold no relevance to you.

UbiquitousBubba
Like, what's wrong with that, you know?

Like... I'm (occasionally) guilty of that one too. Someone on Facebook posted a link to an interview w/ Corey Feldman following his disastrous appearance on the Today Show a while ago. It was practically as disastrous as his performance.
 
"“Like if you Google ‘Corey Feldman Today performance’ like every media is, like –,” Anne started to say before Feldman finished her statement with, “Like ‘Oh it’s so bizarre and he’s so weird and he’s so odd.’ “ 
 
I mean, like, come on... :P
 
 
 
 
 

Beagle
 
how about "prostrate cancer" - what? is it lying face down?  
 

 
I believe that I was lying on my side for the biopsy.