GerardMcNamara
LabDog Sorry for your loss...And Welcome! There are a lot of good people here. I do not post often (I am new to all of this stuff), but I check this website out every day. A lot of great info to be learned off the various forums (and even references to other websites with good information as well)! Again, welcome---and I hope to see (and hear) more stuff from you in the future--- 

Thanks for the welcome Gerard, as well as the expressions of sympathy! I'll trying to do a lot here, I hope... Possibly starting new partnerships and collaborative efforts and seeing what I can do to make what feels like a "turned upside down life" upright again. Most of that, I just have to trust God to do for me, but I always want to try be the best I can be through my efforts as well!

LabDog
A couple of really cool forum guys, BassDaddy and Mesh suggested coming here, and hanging out might be helpful and therapeutic ...
...

HOGWASH!
 
(Well, that's what I was playing in the background, anyway!)
 
Actually this thing, called Coffee House is really good for soup and sandwiches!
 
Nice to see yahh ... welcome! And if you don't have a song about Becan, you owe us ... !!!

Welcome. I was widowed over 20 years ago and I can tell you it took years to get my balance back. But it did come eventually, so try to be patient and above all be good to yourself.

Moshkito

LabDog
A couple of really cool forum guys, BassDaddy and Mesh suggested coming here, and hanging out might be helpful and therapeutic ...
...

HOGWASH!
 
(Well, that's what I was playing in the background, anyway!)
 
Actually this thing, called Coffee House is really good for soup and sandwiches!
 
Nice to see yahh ... welcome! And if you don't have a song about Becan, you owe us ... !!!

lol... I don't even know how to begin to respond to this one! Song about who/what now?  Thanks for the welcome!

LabDog

Moshkito

LabDog
A couple of really cool forum guys, BassDaddy and Mesh suggested coming here, and hanging out might be helpful and therapeutic ...
...

HOGWASH!
 
(Well, that's what I was playing in the background, anyway!)
 
Actually this thing, called Coffee House is really good for soup and sandwiches!
 
Nice to see yahh ... welcome! And if you don't have a song about Becan, you owe us ... !!!

lol... I don't even know how to begin to respond to this one! Song about who/what now?  Thanks for the welcome!

And it only took him one day to come to this conclusion.  Some have been trying to figure Pedro out for years! 

henkejs
Welcome. I was widowed over 20 years ago and I can tell you it took years to get my balance back. But it did come eventually, so try to be patient and above all be good to yourself.

 
I can tell you that your loss, even though so many years have passed, is certainly heartfelt! Years to refocus sounds daunting to say the least, especially when all I've really known in my short 45 year life here, is her! And she was over 30 years of that life!
 
I certainly take your advise to heart, patient, I can do, but I also feel like I'm dealing with a loss of drive. I know you know what that is; how did you deal with that?

LabDog

henkejs
Welcome. I was widowed over 20 years ago and I can tell you it took years to get my balance back. But it did come eventually, so try to be patient and above all be good to yourself.

 
I can tell you that your loss, even though so many years have passed, is certainly heartfelt! Years to refocus sounds daunting to say the least, especially when all I've really known in my short 45 year life here, is her! And she was over 30 years of that life!
 
I certainly take your advise to heart, patient, I can do, but I also feel like I'm dealing with a loss of drive. I know you know what that is; how did you deal with that?

Two choices: Do nothing and dwindle into despair (with all the health and other problems that come with that), or find something new to put your energies into.  This might be helping deliver Meals on Wheels to the elderly, getting a pet (VERY therapeutic!), volunteering somewhere and, eventually, down the road perhaps finding someone else who can use your attention (who might be coming from an identical situation). 
 
No one said it will be easy, and she'll always be in your mind, but it's MUCH healthier to put new things in your head to think about. 

LabDog

henkejs
Welcome. I was widowed over 20 years ago and I can tell you it took years to get my balance back. But it did come eventually, so try to be patient and above all be good to yourself.

 
I can tell you that your loss, even though so many years have passed, is certainly heartfelt! Years to refocus sounds daunting to say the least, especially when all I've really known in my short 45 year life here, is her! And she was over 30 years of that life!
 
I certainly take your advise to heart, patient, I can do, but I also feel like I'm dealing with a loss of drive. I know you know what that is; how did you deal with that?

Craig gave some good advice about trying to find something new to put your energies into, but my point about being patient is not to beat yourself up if you can't seem to get where you want to be as fast as you think you should. It's OK to feel like you're floundering, like you've lost your drive for a while.
 
You know the cliche about taking one day at a time. Sometimes you just need to manage the most basic things: am I getting any sleep, am I eating all right, have I got clean clothes to wear? These may sound like simple things to most people, but they're not always easy when you're feeling overwhelmed.

Welcome!!  Sorry about your wife.  I would be totally lost.
 
As others have said or alluded to, don't expect much high-brow here in the CH.  This is where we come to forget sanity and reason.  Did I say "we"? 

craigb

LabDog

henkejs
Welcome. I was widowed over 20 years ago and I can tell you it took years to get my balance back. But it did come eventually, so try to be patient and above all be good to yourself.

 
I can tell you that your loss, even though so many years have passed, is certainly heartfelt! Years to refocus sounds daunting to say the least, especially when all I've really known in my short 45 year life here, is her! And she was over 30 years of that life!
 
I certainly take your advise to heart, patient, I can do, but I also feel like I'm dealing with a loss of drive. I know you know what that is; how did you deal with that?

Two choices: Do nothing and dwindle into despair (with all the health and other problems that come with that), or find something new to put your energies into.  This might be helping deliver Meals on Wheels to the elderly, getting a pet (VERY therapeutic!), volunteering somewhere and, eventually, down the road perhaps finding someone else who can use your attention (who might be coming from an identical situation). 
 
No one said it will be easy, and she'll always be in your mind, but it's MUCH healthier to put new things in your head to think about. 

That's pretty profound advise! I think I'd like delivering Meals on Wheels, not so sure about a pet at this point as I'm now in flux as far as my living situation is concerned, but I do see your point. I am definitely trying to find new things to put on my mind, but I guess that's the hard part, with practically everything leading into reminders that send me...