The reason is that you are not adopting any type of system levels wise throughout your productions. You need to get into something like the K system approach to levels. VU metering on tracks and busses and masterbuss. The idea is to keep rms levels consistent on tracks and busses and don't worry about the peaks. They take care of themselves with the built in headroom available within the K system approach. Limiters are not required in the mixdown stage. If they are you are doing something very wrong.
You could choose K-20 as your ref level and everything will be the same except the average level of the music will end up lower but with even more headroom. K-20 masters will have to come up higher though in the mastering phase in order to reach commercial levels.
You need to: Choose a ref level and work at that eg K-14
Calibrate your system so when you play back an rms test wave with its peaks reaching -14dB the VU meters will show 0dBu. (plenty of great VST VU meters to choose from)
Ensure your tracks are all at K-14, your busses are at K-14 and your final mix is also at K-14. It does not matter how big or busy or dense your mix may be you can still satisfy these requirements.
I don't see any peaking anywhere in my system ever. No red lights coming on anywhere. As it should be.
Don't try and make your mix loud. That is where people go wrong. Keep everything at your K ref level and turn up the monitors in your studio to be the SPL ref level eg 85 dB SPL.
All of your tracks will end up the same level prior to mastering. You then wait a week and master all the tracks together and it is here you can raise the overall rms level of your tracks upward toward the higher commercial levels you may be after.
You definitely need the VU meter VST's because DAW's do not (normally) provide accurate rms metering especially at K reference levels (except Studio One does however)
What you have to do is to pull all the tracks down that are feeding a buss so the buss just reads the K ref level on the VU's. Then mix all the busses to the master so the master is just reaching the final K ref level too. When you get this right you are well away from any peaking or clipping anywhere.
Turn your monitors up and stop trying to make your mix loud. Mixing is NOT the time to do this, mastering is.