When I saw the doctor for my anxiety issues in January, I mentioned my "stage fright" problem. Having been off the stage for 15 years before last year and only performing occasionally, it can be tough to manage the physical consequences of performance anxiety.
 
In my case, it's made all the more difficult by the fact that I have always suffered from some light form of "essential tremors" - nothing debilitating - I can pass a thread through a needle, etc. But fatigue and/or stage fright make it a lot more difficult to manage.
 
So the doctor prescribed a Beta Blocker called propanolol, and I finally had the opportunity to test it last night, as my wife and I were invited to play at a Rolling Stones tribute night.
 
Having not been onstage for almost a year, and having been feeling all but top shape recently I almost felt like calling it off. But I couldn't let my wife down, and I thought - what better opportunity to test those meds...
 
Obviously, I sampled a trial dose before - last week for the big rehearsals.
 
And as it turns out, the Beta-Blocker really helps big time.
 
Considering that I should be starting to perform more regularly in the next few months, self-medication (alcohol) isn't really an option. I don't see medication as a permanent solution either, but as a tool to help me get back on the saddle. Judging from experience, once we start to perform more often, things will get back under control.
 
I'll always be a studio cat first, but now, at least, it's really by choice, not because I dread being on stage so much.
 
Anyway, having been made so miserable for such a long time, I thought it was worth passing the tip if it can help anyone who suffers from similar issues.


 

Well, going on stage is one of the loneliest experiences I've known.  With the lights and all, it's very alien and strange.  Often the critics in the peanut gallery have never done time in the spot light.  Once you do it, you can commiserate with those that have.  Nobody really discusses it much.  

My worst fears are playing small, intimate events, or worse still, playing a small intimate event solo. I've happened to perform solo fingerpicked guitar pieces in front of small audiences a few times and it terrified me. When there's a big crowd of people you can successfully think of it as a large blob of whatever, but when you're in that small space with a select group of people watching you up close then you're far more aware of them as individuals and you feel their eyes on you. Playing something like an intricate fingerstyle piece in front of an audience like that, I get this crippling fear that I'm going to forget the notes and make a complete ass of myself. I think what makes it so bad is that I think that if I screw up, they're going to feel embarrassed for me and then I'm going to be embarrassed that they're embarrassed for me and so on. Totally stupid I know, because I've witnessed great musicians screw up pieces quite spectacularly, immediately laugh it off and nobody's embarrassed for anyone. 
 
Having said that, I'll always remember the story my dad told me about seeing Andres Segovia in concert. He came on stage with his guitar, sat down, put his foot on the stool and farted very loudly. He was so embarrassed he had to walk off stage to compose himself before coming back on to start the performance. What if something like that happens to me? Think I'll just stick with Sonar....

sharke
My worst fears are playing small, intimate events, or worse still, playing a small intimate event solo. I've happened to perform solo fingerpicked guitar pieces in front of small audiences a few times and it terrified me. When there's a big crowd of people you can successfully think of it as a large blob of whatever, but when you're in that small space with a select group of people watching you up close then you're far more aware of them as individuals and you feel their eyes on you. Playing something like an intricate fingerstyle piece in front of an audience like that, I get this crippling fear that I'm going to forget the notes and make a complete ass of myself. I think what makes it so bad is that I think that if I screw up, they're going to feel embarrassed for me and then I'm going to be embarrassed that they're embarrassed for me and so on. Totally stupid I know, because I've witnessed great musicians screw up pieces quite spectacularly, immediately laugh it off and nobody's embarrassed for anyone. 
 
Having said that, I'll always remember the story my dad told me about seeing Andres Segovia in concert. He came on stage with his guitar, sat down, put his foot on the stool and farted very loudly. He was so embarrassed he had to walk off stage to compose himself before coming back on to start the performance. What if something like that happens to me? Think I'll just stick with Sonar....

I totally understand that! 
 
When I was studying classical guitar, we had recitals every couple of months - I hated those. They often took place in some kind of large classroom, and the public consisted of the students families and friends. It seemed even worst because 99% of the people in the room weren't there to see you or anyone else on the bill -  they were there for their kid/brother/friend.
 
The last one I remember, I was going through a particularly challenging piece when a baby started crying in the audience It completely broke my concentration and I had to walk off the stage w/o finishing the piece.
 
By comparison, rock shows are easy. First because, you're not stuck alone front stage. Second because loudness is forgiving. Third, in many cases, the people who came to the show came to see and hear you. Not to mention that there's often alcohol and other substances involved on their end and that with all the yelling and jumping around in the audience, you don't have to worry as much about delivering an absolutely flawless performance.
 
But the Beta-Blockers are still a most welcome helper. I wish I had those back then. I remember when I auditioned for the music school, I was so nervous that, afterwards, my teacher mentioned to my mom that at first, she thought I was a junkie.

Been on stage a few times, but only a couple times playing guitar and those times were with a band. Sometimes I can feel comfortable up there, but other times I'm a train wreck!

craigb
Been on stage a few times, but only a couple times playing guitar and those times were with a band. Sometimes I can feel comfortable up there, but other times I'm a train wreck!

Back in college, I used to keep the highest results all year long to avoid doing the mandatory oral presentation at the end of the semester. I'd end up merely passing in spite of the brilliant results I had on written presentations. But I really did anything I could to avoid standing up in front of the class - much to my teachers' dismay. 

Haven't played in front of an audience for a long time now. I used to gig regularly back in the '90's with a rock/blues band, and I was always terrified right before the show, to the point of vomiting sometimes. When the end of the set came I wanted to keep on playing though, the adrenalin buzz always took over.

I can only agree playing live is test, fortunately I used to arrange the cymbals on my kit so I had minimum view of the audience.  Yes I hid behind my drums.

Many folks use alcohol or pharmaceuticals either the legal variety or the illegal kind to take the edge off a bit  I don't recommend using either because both roads can lead to serious other issues.
 
So, just do it straight.  Sure it's scary and you're nervous at the start.... but after a few songs and you realize the crowd is liking what you're doing, it becomes fun and totally enjoyable. Then it becomes addictive and ends much too soon. The fear we experience comes from the fear that we will mess up really bad or the crowd won't like us.
 
Well, both are real fears that can happen.  And once you live through a few of both, it's just another day on stage when it does. I found that if they don't like you, you probably booked the wrong gig to start with and shouldn't have been playing there at all.   Kinda like a metal band playing the country club wedding event.... not a good fit.
 
Mistakes, hey everyone makes them and 99% of the time the audience didn't even catch the fact that you messed up. If you do blow it really big.... make a joke about it and move on immediately to a new song.... most time the audience will laugh with you or at you, either way, you will survive the experience. 
 
I had a tendency to repeat a bad and obviously bad note if I hit one.... making it sound like it was totally intentional.  I even had a guy come up after and tell me he really liked that "thing" I played....since it was really unique..... uhhhh  yeah dude, that was a mistake.

The irony is that I don't mind the stress. I wouldn't mind puking, I wouldn't mind not sleeping for 2 days before, I don't mind being afraid and being nervous - so long as I have access to my tools (hands). 
 
My only concern is when my forearms and hands freeze and I can't play the song as good as I can. I mean, I play it, but... Back in the days, I used to work out the set list in function of my anxiety. Last night, I didn't have a say on when, where and what I was playing. - And it was a good thing.
 
For weeks before the show, I was looking at pictures of friends who were invited to the show and thinking - I don't belong on that stage. Look at those guys, I'm not one of them. The impostor syndrome. But then, even my wife suffers from it.
 
I'm glad to have found out that I could at least get a chance to compete...