trimph1
Maybe if we actually treated each other the way we would want to be treated we would not be seeing the kinds of threads we see upstairs..or anywhere else for that matter.
That's the crux of it right there, trimph. I sincerely doubt that some of the stuff we read on here would be the way it would be expressed in person or if two people met at a bar or somewhere and just started talking. This is where I take the forum too seriously. I treat it exactly like I do when I'm out in the real world. Let's face it...part of this is the real world. We're real people attempting to type what we'd speak minus the facial gestures, tones of voice. If you think about it...that's a pretty hard thing to do...and we're lucky we don't argue more often. LOL!! Yeah, we know we have some fearless tough guys on here that can probably eat nails and put their heads through walls while laughing about it. But would they really lash out at someone like we see on here in person for the sake of being sarcastic? It really makes me wonder. I don't think they would.
Alegria: totally agree there. I also think talking about it is a cool thing and I wish it would have went over better. The problem is, those that are a bit emotional already from it have eaten enough crow. Sometimes we vent when things bother us. I also think (and I know it's hard to watch a forum the size of this one and we don't want total censorship) certain things need to be taken care of on here as far as moderation. Do you know what really gets me man? Someone attacks another where the majority knows it was an attack...a mod misses it or lets it go, and the person attacked goes off in defense...and either that person that lost his cool gets banned, or someone comes in and says "now you both stop it".
I can't tell you how much that bothers me man. Seriously. Kinda like the Mayweather fight this past weekend. Dude intentionally head-butts Mayweather (who I'm not too fond of) Ortiz goes to hug him to say he's sorry, (remember, you're supposed to protect yourself at all times) so Mayweather touches his gloves and immediately knocks him out cold. And...Mayweather gets flack for it! The dude head-butted his mouth so hard he needed stitches all through his mouth. So....because he decides to say "I'm sorry" it just goes away? Yeah, Ortiz got a point taken away from him...but that doesn't stop the bleeding in Floyd's mouth....that doesn't change that if Floyd wasn't savvy enough to move in time that this head butt could have literally hit his head, eye or whatever else and really been a problem. I didn't hear one time from the announcers or anyone else "Victor, that was a dirty thing you did and we're astonished at your actions. You should be ashamed of yourself for head-butting a champion that gave you your biggest shot and your biggest pay day of your career. If he would have head-butted you back and knocked you out cold, so be it." Instead, Mayweather was treated like a criminal...pathetic.
My point in that...people that are offenders in any type of situation, rarely get told in public or in private "look, you're out of line...that's enough out of you or we'll do what we need to do". It's always the one that retaliates that gets the crappy end of the stick. Or it's always "all of you stop it" or the person being attacked is made out to be just as guilty as the one that started the confrontation. If you continuously tease a Golden Retriever...one of the most peaceful dogs of all time, and one day it goes off on you and rips your arm off...do we blame the dog or blame you? Yes, it's sad...no one wants to get mauled by a dog, but in a sense, don't you have it coming to you? Right away, they blame the dog and put it to sleep. That's not how it should work.
I mod 4 forums including my own. When we see someone starting a problem, we watch the situation and post our thoughts in our mod forum because we really don't want to censor anything. When it heats up too much, we go after the guy that started the confrontation. We can't hold the one defending himself responsible. It's OUR faults for letting things escalate. That's what we see here. You *may* get a warning to "chill"...or you could come on here and find out you're banned. What about the person that went out of their way to attack you and put you in this frame of defensive mind? That's just not fair.
Granted, it's near impossible for the Cake staff to worry about tech support issues and all that they do and mod this forum as well. I think there needs to be true moderators that know the people around here as well as how things work. They should be able to send a message to someone and talk to them or warn them if they are wrong, causing problems or are out of line. I got quite a bit of money in Cake software over the years. I'd be pretty livid if someone upset me that was a legit problem on here at least once per week with other members and the Cake staff banned me for defending myself. As a matter of fact, I'd ban their software and do everything I could to talk about that injustice on every forum I could get on.
No one on this forum should have to be scolded for defending themselves towards someone who fights with a different forum member on a weekly basis or with a person that has been a problem many times in the past. It should NEVER get to the point of a person retaliating! A mod should send a message to the offensive person and then contact the offended person and tell him "I've handled so and so...try to hang in there. If he acts up...we'll be watching him closely." That removes alot of stress right there....instantly! That's all that needs to be done. And it's only a few people on here that fit that bill. That's not too bad considering we have thousands of members here. You either remove the problems or remedy the problems....but the first step is for those with the power to accept and deal with the people that ARE the problem.
-Danny